Always (ON HIATUS)
by PrimroseMarieSalvatore
Summary: Katniss fell in love with Peeta after their first kiss in the cave. The rule wasn't changed back at the last minute so the stunt with the berries never happened. Katniss and Peeta are going on their Victory Tour and worse yet, they have to Mentor in the Quarter Quell. The stunt with the berries sparked the rebellion, but what if the stunt with the berries never took place?
1. Chapter 1: After The Games

**Chapter 1**

After the Games

It's been one week since Peeta and I got back from the Games and I've been so happy because I've spent most of the week with Peeta. I'd get up early, hunt, bring the game back to my house in the Victors Village and then go spend most of the rest of the day with Peeta. He started teaching me how to bake a few things a couple days ago and it was adorable seeing him in his apron helping me with the ingredients and giving me instructions on how to properly use the oven. I try to teach him how to hunt and stay quiet while walking in the woods, he's gotten pretty good with a bow and he's actually pretty silent when he walks now. I'm a good teacher. Peeta goes to the bakery to bake even though he doesn't have to. His kitchen was redesigned for a baker, he does bake at his house, but mostly when he's home and has nothing to do. I like looking at him while he bakes, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. It's actually kind of adorable how much he focuses on frosting things perfectly.

It's been about two months and The Victory Tour is creeping closer every day and I really hate thinking about having to "celebrate" mine and Peeta's victory. Just to think, in about another two months, Peeta and I are going to be on a train to all of the districts. I already know that I'm going to dread going to District 11 more than any of the other district because I'm going to have to face Thresh and Rue's families, I didn't kill either of their children, but I still feel guilty because they had to go into the Games in the first place. Peeta can tell that I'm worrying about The Victory Tour and he tells me everything's going to be ok and I have to believe him, but I'm still worried, scared even. Scared of what the other districts will think about us, especially District Two, I may not have killed Clove, but Peeta and I technically killed Cato together, Peeta shoved him off the Cornucopia and the Mutts started eating him alive and I just ended his suffering by shooting him with an arrow. I don't know how I'm going to react to all the faces looking at me, pretending to be happy when really they're heartbroken on the inside. I always tell myself that I won't have to see those faces for another two months and that makes me calm down a little. I decide to go to Peeta's once I get back to the Village from hunting, I don't need to go hunting anymore, my mother, Prim, and I have more than enough money to afford butcher meat but we all prefer fresh game from the woods, so some days I hunt and some days I don't. It's weird not hunting everyday like I used to, but I'll get used to it. When I enter the Victors Village, I head straight to Peeta's house which is just across the street from mine because the Capitol wanted our houses to be as close as the could, not that Peeta and I mind, it's nice to be able to live near each other. I gently knock on Peeta's door three times as I always do, I think he started realizing I'm the only one that knocks on his door like that because all I hear is,

"Come on in, Katniss!" Peeta says.

I walk in to find Peeta sitting on his couch watching the tv, every house in the Victor's Village had one but since only three houses are in use, not many tv's are being used. I can't say I don't like having tv 24/7 but it gets old fast, especially with all the Capitol junk like their stupid animated shorts that play almost every morning. Peeta pats the spot next to him.

"Come sit down." He says. I walk over and sit down next to him and rest my head on his shoulder and he wraps his arm around me pulling me into his strong and protective hold.

"So what brings you here?" He asks and he looks at me. I turn my head and face him,

"Is it a bad thing that I just wanted to see my boyfriend?" I ask, and I chuckle a little. He chuckles a little to and he starts caressing my arm with his thumb,

"No, I guess not." he says. "I was actually hoping you'd stop by, things have been a little lonely without my girl here." I feel my cheeks blush, they always do whenever Peeta calls me his girl, I don't mind, I love it. I curl my feet up underneath me and place my head on Peeta's chest,

"What'cha watching?" I ask.

"Just the Capitol news, there's literally nothing else to do." He replies.

"We could go for a walk around the District." I suggest.

"That sounds like fun, let's do it." He says. We both get up ad Peeta turns his tv off, we hold hands and intertwine our fingers as we walk out the door. It's starting to get chilly in the District, it is the middle of October after all. Peeta and I just walk around the District hand in hand. We decide to go to the meadow, it's a very calming place and I always love to watch the tall grass sway in the gentle breeze. We sit in the meadow and lay my head down on his shoulder and he has his arm around me once again, we sit there in a comfortable silence, listening to the trees as there leaves rustle.

"I wish we didn't have to go on the tour." I say, breaking the silence. "I just want to stay right here with you in District 12."

"I know." He replies gently. "So do I, but we both know we have to go."

"At least we'll have each other right?" I ask.

"We'll always have each other, Katniss." He replies. With that, the comfortable silence comes back, we stay there for who knows how long and we decide to head back to the Village when we notice the sun starting to set.

"That's my favorite color." Peeta says quietly as we make our way back.

"What is?" I ask, realizing I didn't even know.

"Sunset orange." He replies. "What's yours?"

"Green." I reply and I look up at him, before he knows it, my lips meet his and we kiss in the sunset. We finally have to release because we're out of breath and we're both panting a small amount. Peeta walks me back to my house and before he leaves he says,

"Sleep tight, Katniss. I love you."

"I love you, too." I blurt. I really do, but I didn't know that was going to come out of my mouth. Peeta takes his hand and caresses my cheek with his thumb,

"I've been waiting my whole life just to hear those words come out of your mouth." He breathes.

"I've been waiting since I was eleven to say to someone other than my sister." I start. "Don't get me wrong, I love her, but I've always wanted to say it to someone other than her." I reply. Before I know it, Peeta and I are kissing again, when we finally pull apart he says,

"Goodnight, Katniss."

"Goodnight, Peeta." I reply, he turns to go to his house and I go inside mine. When I lay down in my bed, I sigh and stare at the ceiling and think to myself, "What a perfect day."


	2. Chapter 2: The Victory Tour Kick-Off

**Chapter 2**

The Victory Tour Kick-Off

I can't believe it. These past two months have gone by too fast because Peeta and I are leaving for The Victory Tour tomorrow evening, before we leave, Peeta and I are going to spend as much time together as possible because we'll have to spend twelve days traveling from District to District, and then we'll be spending a day in the Capitol and then that night there will be a party for us at the Presidential Palace. I don't want to go, but, being a Victor, and the fact that the party is for Peeta and I, I have to. Ugh. Peeta will be with me the entire time and he'll keep me calm. He always does, I guess it's just the affect he has on me. I try not to think too much about it though because I'm not leaving until tomorrow so I might as well make the best of it. I decide to go over to Peeta's to keep my mind off the tour even though we'll probably end up talking about it anyway, for some reason, I feel perfectly fine talking to Peeta about it, probably because we'll most likely be feeling the same thing, guilt, sadness and hatred. Hatred of the Capitol for creating the Games in the first place. I knock on the door and he tells me to come in, once again, he's on the couch but he's sketching instead of watching tv. I sit next to him and kiss his cheek.

"How you feeling about tomorrow?" He asks. I knew it.

"Kind of terrified to be honest." I reply.

"Don't worry, Katniss." He starts. "I'll be there with you the entire time."

"You being there will probably be the only thing that keeps me sane." I tell him, letting out a small, quiet giggle. Peeta just wraps his arm around my shoulder and we lean back, I rest my head on his chest and he kisses my forehead.

"You'll be just fine, I promise you." He tells me.

"It's just... I don't think I'll be able to keep it together when I see Rue's face on the screen and the sad faces of her family standing on the platform." I start. "She was my friend Peeta, and I watched her die right in my arms. The last thing she ever did with her last breaths was mouth along to the song I was singing. The last thing her lips ever formed were the words 'under the willow' and then she was gone." I feel tears fall down my face and Peeta wipes them away with his thumb and I look into his eyes, those beautiful blue eyes, they're filled with sorrow as well, he may not have known Rue, but he knew we were good friends in the games, even if it was for a short period of time. I lean into Peeta and kiss him lovingly, this kiss reminds me of that one kiss in the cave, the kiss that made me want more, the kiss that made me realize I'm in love with Peeta. We sit there for who knows how long, we just sit in silence with my head against Peeta's chest and his arm around me, holding me close and protectively. I could stay like this forever... but I know that I can't.

The next day comes too soon and I spend most of my morning stressing about the tour today. My prep team will be here around one so I have a free hour to myself after I eat lunch which will probably consist of me pacing or staring at the wall, most like my morning. I do kind of miss Venia, Flavius, and Octavia's chit-chat while they prep me. Oh, how I can't wait to sit in a chair for hours while they prep me and talk about Capitol stuff. It's the middle of October so I wonder what I'll be dressed in. Probably something with fur even though winter isn't for another month but I don't know yet. I've also been worked up about the reaping of the third Quarter Quell this summer because Peeta and I have to mentor a young boy and girl from the district and I'm terrified that I'll get attached to them and break down when they die. What Peeta and I want to do is get someone from our district back home to safety. Well, not really safety but safe from the Games and make sure that they'll never have to go back again. I decide to push the thought of the Quarter Quell away form my mind because it's not until summer and it's barely autumn, but, the card reading is in a few weeks where they announce the one twist that the Games will have this year. I can't wait to see what Snow's come up with for this year. Scratch that, I can wait because I don't want to know what he has planned for the districts this year, but I have to know hence me being a Victor and having to mentor the poor girl that get's reaped.

I finished my lunch about an hour ago so my prep team will be here any minute. I hear a knock on the door and I already know who it is. I head downstairs and open the door to see Venia, Flavius, and Octavia and standing behind them, the only real friend I have in the Capitol, Cinna. I hug Venia, Flavius and Octavia first but then I crash into Cinna's embrace and almost knock him over. When we pull apart we look each other in the eye and smile at each other and then my prep team has to ruin the moment and pull me into the bathroom and I'm sure I heard Cinna chuckle a little before they close the door.

After about six to seven hours of sitting in the bathroom while my prep team prepped me for the interview later this evening, it's around eight o'clock and the camera's will be here at eight-thirty so that leaves me with Cinna for half an hour to show me my outfit. I look in the mirror and I don't see the Katniss Everdeen that comes from District 12, I see the Katniss Everdeen that comes from the Capitol. More like was made by the Capitol. I put a robe on and walk out of the bathroom for the first time in hours and my leg muscles are a little stiff from sitting for so long. I find Cinna in the living room seated on the couch and I walk up to him.

"You ready to see your outfit?" He asks.

"As ready as I'll ever be." I reply honestly.

"Come on, you really think I'd make you something that the Capitol will love but still suits you?" He whispers to me.

"I sure hope not." I joke, and I giggle a little. Cinna take me to my bedroom, goes to my closet and pulls out a bag with my outfit. He leaves the room while I change. It's actually quite like he described, the Capitol will love it but it still suits me too. Cinna, he never seems to disappoint me. I put the outfit on, it's a well fitting pair of black jeans, a long sleeved, heavy white shirt, a simple and warm fur jacket (it being the middle of December and all), and to top it off, some wool socks and warm gray ugg boots. I really like this outfit and I think I'd wear it more times if I wanted to. I don't know when I would because nothing that special ever really happens in my house. I walk downstairs and Venia, Flavius and Octavia gasp and compliment me on how gorgeous I look. Cinna comes up to me and asks,

"Did I satisfy you?"

"I think it'd be hard for you not to satisfy me, Cinna. I absolutely love this." I reply.

"I knew you would. Now, let's do your hair." He says to me. He let's me stand while he does my hair because he know's I've been sitting too long for my taste. He pulls two stands of my hair from either side of me face and pins them in the back. Out of nowhere, Effie bursts through the front door and hollers,

"All right people, it is 8:27! Katniss, come stand by the door please and I will tell you when you can walk outside and reunite with Peeta."

"Ok, Effie." I say and I do as I was told. I stand by the door and when 8:30 finally comes, I'm out the door where there's a camera over my porch step railing filming me and I know this is the interview where they catch up on mine and Peeta's lives since the Games. I put a smile on my face for the camera but I smile for real when I see Peeta coming down his porch steps too. The camera follows our movements until we are practically running to each other, Peet picks me up and twirls me around and he slips on the snow causing us to fall, me on top of him. I forget about the cameras as I look into his beautiful blue eyes, we look each other in the eye for about a minute and then I lean down and kiss him because I've missed him all day and I know that he missed me too, the sound of Caesar's voice through the speaker breaks us apart and we look at the camera before we stand up.

"Sorry Caesar," I start. "We haven't seen each other all day so we couldn't help ourselves."

"It's perfectly alright, it's your guys' day." He replies. "So, how have you two been?"

"Everything's been great here in 12." Peeta says. "Katniss and I couldn't be happier." I completely agree on that because I know that Peeta is my life and without him I would die too. I smile and nod in agreement.

"What was it like at first when you two got home?" Caesar asks.

"It was a little awkward at first." I say. "If Peeta and I were just on a walk around the District, whenever people saw us they always gasped and whispered to the others around them but I guess we're sort of used to it by now." I giggle when I finish talking. Caesar is laughing so hard, harder than Peeta and I combined.

"Well, with you two being the Star-Crossed Lovers and all, you are some of the most famous people in all of Panem." He replies.

"Don't we know." Peeta says jokingly. We all laugh and Caesar continues on with questions for us to answer and before we know it the interview is over and we have to head to the train station.


	3. Chapter 3: The Victory Tour: District 11

**Chapter 3**

The Victory Tour: District 11

Peeta and I step on the train and it looks so similar to the train we rode to the Capitol after we were reaped. Crystal chandeliers, platinum doorknobs, and the food is already set up for snacking later tonight. Effie leads Peeta and I to our room since the Capitol doesn't want us to sleep separately for The Victory Tour, not that I mind, the more time I can spend with Peeta the better. I change into a pair of jeans and a forest green blouse, I take my hair down, brush it and put it in it's original braid. I look over and see that Peeta changed into jeans and a white t-shirt. He walks over to me and take my hand in his and we intertwine our fingers as we head out of our room. We find Effie and Haymitch in the tv room, Effie is touching up her makeup and Haymitch is doing the usual, drinking. Peeta and I sit on the love seat in the middle of the room, I curl up next to him and the tv turns on suddenly and we see the face of Caesar Flickerman appear on the screen as he begins the show.

"Earlier this evening, I had an interview with the Star-Crossed Lover's from District Twelve before they boarded the train for their Victory Tour." Caesar began. The crowd cheered and Caesar continued,

"Let's take a look at it shall we?" He asks the crowd. He walks over to the side of the stage and mine and Peeta's interview played on a screen on the wall near where Caesar was standing. Peeta and I already lived the interview why should we have to watch it? I kept quiet and just leaned into Peeta and his hand caressed my arm. Caesar continues in for a few more minutes talking about how exciting it is that our Victory Tour is finally taking place and how we'll be in the capitol in a few weeks and after he says that the crowd goes wild. Which really wasn't surprising hence they love us, the Star-Crossed Lover's. At first I didn't like our little nickname but I'm not gonna lie, I'm starting to like it. Finally it ends and I look at Peeta, he looks down at me and says,

"We literally just lived that, why make us relive it?" He asks jokingly.

"I don't know, I think it was more for the audience than for us but I don't really mind. I would relive that fall and kiss in the snow any day." I tell him.

"I would too." He replies. He kisses my forehead and looks forward to Effie who's done fixing her makeup and asks,

"What do we do now, Effie?"

"Actually, we don't have anything planned until tomorrow so you two can go get some sleep if you'd like." She replies in her Capitol accent.

"Ok, I was just wondering." Peeta said. "You wanna go, Katniss?" He asks. I'm extremely tired yet not exhausted so I nod. We both stand up and walk to our room, I change into a t-shirt and gray yoga pants, Peeta changes into a pair of sweatpants, he sleeps shirtless, not that I mind. I like to feel his warmth and listen to his heartbeat. A reminder that he's still living and breathing, if Peeta died, I don't know what I would do. I push the though from my mind and snuggle into Peeta on the bed and he wraps his arm around me and pulls me close. We sit there in the darkness and a few minutes later I hear Peeta's breathing get slow down into short, steady breaths and I know he fell asleep. I stare into the darkness before the steady sound of his heartbeat lulls me to sleep.

We are woken up by Effie telling us we have another big, big, day ahead of us. Peeta and I groan and get out of bed, I take a quick shower and dress in the outfit that was laid out for me on the bed while Peeta showers. Since District 11 is in a different part of the country, it's warm and sunny and not cold and snowy like District 12 is right now. I'm wearing a simple red quarter sleeved shirt, a pair of denim jeans, and black flats, and to top it off, I just brush my hair and leave it down. Peeta is in something similar to what I'm wearing except his shirt is a little lighter red than mine and he's wearing black work boots.

"I guess they still want us to dress the same." He says jokingly. I laugh and the reply,

"It's the Star-Crossed Lover's of District 12's Victory Tour, what did you expect?"

He chuckles. "I don't know what I expected." He says.

"Me either." I reply. "Let's go eat some breakfast shall we?"

"Sounds good to me." He says. We walk out of our room hand in hand all the way to the dining car where we find Haymitch and Effie sitting at the table apparently waiting for us. We sit down and the Avox's serve breakfast. Haymitch goes on talking about how we need to act for the camera's, I expected this from Effie but she's surprisingly quiet this morning other than when she came to wake us up. I know she'll be blabbing on about todays schedule as she always does. As if on cue, Effie pulls out a piece of paper with the schedule and starts ranting on about how we have to be in he right places, at the right times, on time. She get's so annoying sometimes, I just want to strangle her but I always push the thought from my mind because I've already killed so many people, why would I try to purposely hurt someone because they get on my nerves? When Effie's finished, Peeta and I have cleaned our plates and the Avox's have taken them away. We stand up and head to the sitting room knowing we have to face District 11 in a little less than an hour. We just sit on the couch and hold each other. A little too soon for my taste, Effie comes in and tells us it's "show time." Peeta and I slowly stand up and head towards the exit of the train and step onto the grounds on District 11.

We are guided to a car that will take us to District 11's Justice Building, Peeta and I get in and the car takes off. I look out the window and watch as the citizens of this District walk towards the front of the Justice Building for mine and Peeta's "visit" today. When the car stops we are guided inside and taken to behind the front doors and we wait for the mayor of District 11 to introduce us. I honestly just want to get this over with already. Finally, the mayor introduces us,

"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome, the Victor's of the 74th Hunger Games, Katniss Everdeen, and Peeta Mellark!" The doors open and Peeta and I walk out onto the platform and stop at the microphone at the front of the "stage". I force myself to smile at the crowd but when I see Rue's family on their platform in the crowd, my smile slowly fades when I see the tears streaming down their faces and Rue's mother's eyes meet mine and behind all the sorrow and despair over losing her daughter, it's as if she's saying _"_ _Thank you for trying."_ As in trying to save her daughter. I did the best I could to save her but that spear got her pretty good. My vision begins to blur as I feel the tears forming in my eyes, I quickly wipe them away because I'm not supposed to be crying and I'm pretty sure Rue wouldn't want me to be crying over her. I look over at Peeta, he nods slightly and begins to recite the speech that Effie wrote him. When he's done, his eyes meet mine as if to ask, " _Do you wanna say something?"_ , I shake my head slowly and when we turn to walk away I get one last glance at Rue's family and I meet her mother's eyes one last time and my eyes tell her, _"_ _I'm sorry."_ , she nods as if she got the message. I look away before I start crying. When we get inside, my vision starts to blur but it's not from tears. I think I know this feeling, a little too well. I look in Peeta's direction and he looks back at me.

"Peeta?" I say.

"Yeah?" He asks.

"I...I..." I stutter.

"Katniss, what's wrong?" He asks. I can hear the worry filling his voice. When I don't answer, Peeta comes over and stands in front of me. He keeps repeating my name but it's all echoey, the last thing I hear is Peeta screaming my name trying to get me to answer him, but I feel myself starting to fall and everything goes black.

When I start to regain conciseness, the first thing I register is that I'm laying down and my head is in Peeta's lap. He's stroking my hair and he's also saying something so I keep my eyes closed to listen.

"Come on, Katniss, please wake up. Please wake up, please wake up." He's saying. I think he's crying because he kind of sounds like it. He must be so worried. I don't even know what caused me to black out. I don't want him to worry anymore, so I decide to say something.

"Peeta." I whisper hoarsely. I think I started Peeta because he sounds shocked.

"Katniss?" He says. He starts to caress my cheek with his thumb, my eyes flutter open and the first thing I see are Peeta's beautiful blue eyes filled with worry looking back at me.

"Peeta." I whisper again.

"I'm right here, Katniss, I'm not going anywhere." He says.

"What happened?" I ask.

"We walked into the Justice Building after the speech and you blacked out." He says.

"How long have I been out?"I ask.

"About three hours. You scared me to death." He says. I look at his face and I was right, he was crying because I see the paths the tears look down his cheeks.

"I'm sorry." I whisper.

"Don't be." He says. "Nobody knew you were going to black out afterwards. Effie shrieked when she saw you fall. I caught you before you hit the ground."

"Thanks, Peeta." I say.

"Anytime, Katniss." He replies. "I'll always protect you."

"I'll always protect you too," I start. "because that's what you and I do, protect each other."

"We do do that don't we?" He says softly. I giggle a little and sit up nest to Peeta. He wraps his arm around me and pulls me close.

"Where are we?" I ask.

"In one of the sitting rooms of the Justice Building." He replies. "People came over to help you but I told them I had it, I picked you up and I followed them to this room. I haven't left the entire time."

"Thanks again, Peeta." I say.

"Anytime, Katniss." He says. He kisses my forehead and I look at him and say,

"I hope I'm not going to pass out after every District because that would get tiring for everyone." I giggle softly.

"I hope so, too." Peeta replies. "You scared me enough today and if you passed out after every District I'd start to think there was something seriously wrong with you."

"It would most likely scare me to death, too." I say.

"It would scare all of us." Peeta replies. "I think even Haymitch."

"Haymitch?" I ask.

"Yeah, you should've seen his face when you passed out, it had worry written all over it." He answers.

"Really?" I ask.

"Yes, really." Peeta says. "It shocked me a little but I think Haymitch does care about us, Katniss."

"I know that he does." I start. "We're practically his family."

"I don't think he'll admit it though." Peeta says jokingly.

"It's Haymitch we're talking about, of course he won't." I say, I start to giggle when there's a knock on the door. Haymitch walks in. Funny how we were just talking about him.

"Glad to see you're awake, sweetheart." He says.

"Glad to be awake, Haymitch." I reply.

"Well, I just came to tell you that it's almost time for the banquet." He says. Oh yeah, I forgot all about the banquets Peeta and I have to attend after every District "visit".

"Ok, we'll be there in a minute." Peeta says. Haymitch nods and walks back out. I sigh and look at Peeta.

"I really don't wanna go to that banquet." I say.

"Me either, but we have ten more District visits and ten more banquets and then a big Capitol party." He says.

I laugh a little, "I know." I say. "I just don't want to go to them."

"I know you don't, but we're kind of have to go." He says.

"Well, lets go and get it over then." I say standing up. I stumble a little bit because I'm still a little bit dizzy, but luckily Peeta's right behind me and he steadies me,

"Steady now. Are you gonna be ok?" He asks.

"Yeah, I think I'll be fine, I'm just a little dizzy still." I reply.

"Ok, let's go." He says. He opens the door and we head to the Square of District 11 for the District Banquet.


	4. Chapter 4: The Big Surprise

Chapter 4

The Big Surprise

Boy, am I glad that this stupid Tour is almost over. I blacked out in THREE Districts. THREE. I blacked out in District 11, District 2, and District 1. I blacked out in Districts 1 and 2 because I killed one Tribute from both Districts and I couldn't handle seeing their parents angry faces. I scared Peeta to death and I scared myself too. At least I didn't black out in ALL of the Districts, now THAT, would've scared Peeta the most. The banquets after the "visits" are always the worst though I think because all the citizens of each District that come up to Peeta and I say congratulations and all that but I can see the sadness in their eyes and it's their because they lost someone near and dear to them. Tomorrow we head to the Capitol and it'll be a full day's trip. I'm getting ready for bed and I just got out of the shower and into my pajamas. I walk out of the bathroom and find Peeta sitting on the side of the bed, he turns around and smiles when he sees me and I know he's been thinking about something by the look in his eyes. I sit down next to him and lay my head on his shoulder.

"Peeta." I say.

"Yes?" He replies.

"What are you thinking about?" I ask.

"I'm worried about you, Katniss." He starts. "I know you didn't black out in all of the Districts, but you blacked out more than once and that's enough to scare me to death."

"I know, Peeta." I say. "I don't know why I blacked out so many times I just did."

"That's what's got me worried, Katniss." He says. "The fact that we don't know what's causing it." I sigh and look at him.

"I feel perfectly fine now, Peeta." I point out.

"I know that." He replies. "But all three times you blacked out, they lasted longer than the last. First it was three hours, then it was five hours and then it was seven hours, Katniss. After you blacked out today, you were out for so long I didn't know if you would wake up for days."

"Oh, Peeta." I say. "I'm so sorry."

"You don't have to apologize, it's not your fault you can't control black outs." He states.

"I can feel when I'm about to black out, my vision blurs and everything I hear echoes and the next thing I know, everything goes black, but I do try to fight them, Peeta. I just can't win." I say.

"I know." He starts. "You're a fighter, Katniss. I wouldn't have you any other way." He kisses my forehead and wraps his arms around me. We sit like that for who knows how long, in the dark, I look at the clock and it's almost 11:30 PM,

"We should get some sleep, it's getting late." I say. We pull apart and Peeta just looks at me and says ok. We both lay down and pull the comforter over us. Peeta wraps his arms around me and I place my head on his chest right over where his heart is. It doesn't take long for sleep to find me.

 _ **I'm running as fast as I can, Peeta not far behind me. We're almost to the Cornucopia, I can see it through the opening in the trees. The Mutts are not far behind us but when we finally reach out destination, I help Peeta up because of his leg and then he grabs my hand and pulls me up with him as the Mutts try to reach us. The next thing I know we're fighting Cato and finally Peeta pushes him off the Cornucopia and the Mutts start to devour him. I finally decide to shoot an arrow through Cato's heart to end his suffering. Peeta and I look at each other. I hug him tightly and I never want to let go, Cato's cannon fires and the sun starts to come out, but then, all of a sudden Claudius Templesmith's voice booms through the arena and says that the rule change has been revoked. I look over at Peeta and start to cry because I can't imagine a life without him. He tells me to kill him so I can go home but I refuse, I drop my bow and arrows and hug him again.**_

" _ **Katniss, one of us has to die, they have to have their Victor." He tells me.**_

" _ **No, I'm not going to kill you, Peeta, I can't live without you!" I shout.**_

" _ **Just do it." He says.**_

" _ **No! Peeta, I can't! I can't lose you!" I holler.**_

" _ **You won't lose me." He starts. "I'll always be right here, with you." He puts his hand over my heart. I hug him again, more tightly than ever before. Out of nowhere I hear a cannon fire, I gasp when I feel Peeta collapsing to the ground. I notice he has something in his hands, I open his cold hand to find the Nightlock berries. I had forgotten all about them and Peeta must have took them out of my pocket and ate them while we were hugging.**_

" _ **NOOOO!" I scream and begin sobbing. "WHY PEETA? WHY?!" I collapse next to him and hold him tight. I kiss his cold lips and rock his lifeless body. Claudius Templesmith's voice booms through the arena once again,**_

" _ **Ladies and gentlemen, may I present, the winner of the-"**_

"Katniss!" My eyes shoot open to find Peeta's blue eyes staring down at me, filled with worry.

"Peeta?" I say.

"Katniss, it's ok, it was just a nightmare." He says softly.

"Peeta, you're alive! You're alive!" I say. I wrap my arms around his neck and he let's me cry into his shoulder while he strokes my hair. I calm down eventually, but the nightmare still plagues my mind.

"What was it about?" Peeta asks.

"We were back in the arena." I start. "Cato had just died. I thought we had won but then Claudius Templesmith's voice said the rule change was revoked. You tried to make me kill you so I could go home but I wouldn't. The last time I hugged you, you dug the Nightlock out of my pocket and ate it, I had forgotten all about it, you died right in my arms and they were about to announce me as the winner when you woke me up."

"I woke up because you were screaming my name." Peeta says. "I can't imagine how horrible that was for you."

"It was pretty horrible." I say. "Peeta, can I ask you something?"

"Anything." He replies.

"No matter the circumstances we're in, will you stay with me?" I ask.

He rests my head on his chest and starts gently caressing my arm with his thumb before he replies,

"Always."

When I wake up, I remember my nightmare from last night, I don't know what I would do if my dream was reality, I can't live without Peeta. If he dies, I die too. I look around, Peeta must've woken up earlier than me because he's not in the room. I get out of bed, take a shower, and get dressed. We'll arrive in the Capitol late tonight and in the morning Peeta and I have a live interview with Caesar, then we have a couple hours to tour the Capitol, then we have to get prepped for the party, and then the most our night and early morning will consist of the big Capitol party for Peeta and I. I'm not looking forward to the Capitol party at all. I can tell that Peeta isn't either. We have an entire day before we get there so we make the best of it. We spend as much time alone with each other as possible. At almost every stop the train makes for fuel, Peeta and I go outside and admire the view and walk around the tracks before we have to get back onto the train and start traveling again. We're at the final stop before we reach the Capitol and Peeta and I can't sleep so we just look out the window in our room and stare at the stars. Peeta is holding me and I'm sitting in his lap as we stare out the window.

"We should try to get some sleep." Peeta says.

"We should, we do have a big, big, day tomorrow." I say, mocking Effie a little. Peeta quietly chuckles. I get off of his lap and we head over to the bed. When we lay down, Peeta wraps his arms around me and I lay my head on his chest right where his heart is like I always do.

We're woken by Effie once again pounding on the door telling us that we have a "big, big, day" ahead of us. I get out of bed, shower, brush my teeth and get dressed. Peeta does the same. Once we're both finished getting ready for the day, we walk hand in hand to the dining cart to have breakfast. Our interview with Caesar is in a few hours so Peeta and I had to put on the clothes we are going to wear to the interview this morning. We've been in the Capitol for about two or three hours but who's counting? I just want to get this "big, big, day" over with so I can go home and actually spend some quality time with Peeta. I don't dare even talk to Gale anymore, he seems mad and jealous that I'm with Peeta and honestly, I could care less, I've been avoiding him because the last time I tried to talk to him after the Games, it got awkward so I ended up walking away and I haven't spoke with Gale since then and it's been almost four months. I can't say I miss him though, because I don't. Ever since Peeta and I got back, it's like Gale is a completely different person. I can say that I miss my hunting partner even though I don't need to go hunting anymore. I miss the boy I met not many years ago but that boy has changed into something full of hatred and now I can't even see a small part of the boy I once knew when I look at Gale. I push the though from my mind and focus on my breakfast. I'm holding Peeta's hand under the table and I never want to let go. We finish breakfast and once our plates are taken away, Effie says that we need to be ready to go in five minutes or less if we want to be on time for the interview. I don't want to go to the interview at all, but I have too. I didn't want to go on this stupid tour, but I had too. I always have to do things I don't want to do. Peeta doesn't want to go either, he didn't want to go on this stupid tour either, but I guess the odds will never be in our favor.

Peeta and I make our way to the train doors and Effie says there may be paparazzi hence how famous we are in the Capitol. The train doors open and sure enough, Effie was right, there was paparazzi all around. Cameras flashing and questions flying out of all the reporters mouths, questions like, "How was the tour?" "Did you enjoy all the Districts?" and someone even yelled, "Peeta, kiss her!" Peeta listened to the last one, we bent down and kissed me and I kissed him back. I don't need to pretend for the cameras, if someone were to tell me to "act in love" with Peeta, I would flat out respond with, "I don't have to pretend because I am in love with Peeta." After a minute we break apart having run our of breath. I had completely forgotten about the photographers and I'm pretty sure there's going to be a picture of mine and Peeta's kiss on the front cover of a Capitol magazine within the next day or two. Peeta and I continued walking hand in hand to the tv broadcast building where our interview with Caesar would be. It's not that far from the train station but it's not like I care. The closer we get to the broadcast building, the sooner we can get this interview over with.

When we reach the broadcast building, we are directed backstage where we will walk out once Caesar introduces us. Caesar begins the broadcast,

"Good morning, Panem! So happy you could all join us this morning!" The crowd cheers and when they quiet down, Caesar continues,

"As you probably know, we have some very special guests, please welcome, coming from their Victory Tour, Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark!" The crowd goes wild as Peeta and I walk out and stand next to Caesar. Once the crowd settles down, Caesar continues,

"So, how was the Tour?" He asks. Peeta answers.

"It was alright. It was nice to see all the Districts, Katniss had a few problems but she's fine now." He says.

"What kind of problems?" Caesar asks.

"I had a couple random black outs, I don't know what caused them, but I feel fine now." I answer.

"Well, that's good, we wouldn't want anything bad happening to either of you two, right folks?" Caesar asks the crowd. The all just yell "right" in return. Caesar continues with the questions,

"What was your favorite District to visit on the tour?" He asks.

"I enjoyed all of the Districts, but if I had to pick a favorite I would probably pick District 4." Peeta said. "I loved the beaches and the blue water in the sunset just looked amazing."

"What about you, Katniss?" Caesar asks me.

"I would probably pick District 7, I loved looking at all the trees, I'm not gonna lie, I felt like I was back in District 12 for a minute when I saw those trees because they looked so much like the ones at home." I answer.

"Well, that sounds lovely." He says. "Just one more question."

"Fire away." Peeta says.

"Alright then," Caesar starts. "What do you guys have planned for your future?" I'm not sure if I can answer that question because I don't know what to say because I haven't exactly thought about it. I'm shocked when I hear Peeta mumble to himself, "Here goes nothing." Then he gets down on one knee in front of me and holds out a box with a ring inside.

"Katniss, will you marry me?" Peeta asks. I'm shocked yet happy, I start to cry, I lift my hand to my mouth and nod. I take my hand away from my mouth and reply,

"Yes, yes. Of course I'll marry you, Peeta!" I say. I'm overjoyed and I can tell Peeta is too because I said yes. He slides the ring onto my finger, he stands up and I hug him tightly, when we pull away, I kiss him and he kisses me back, I hardly noticed the crowd started to cheer when I said yes. When Peeta and I pull away, Caesar had tears in his eyes. Peeta and I look to the cheering crowd and smile. The smile plastered on my face is not fake at all, it's all real. I'm engaged to Peeta Mellark. I think back to when I didn't want to get married. Boy, was I stupid, having someone you love propose to you, it's one of the best feelings in the world. I still can't believe it. Peeta and I are going to get married. I am very excited right now. I know the Capitol will be where our wedding take place and the decorations and my dress and most of the guests will be done by the Capitol, I just can't wait to be married to Peeta. Have our toasting in District 12 and sign the papers.

"Looks like we'll have to set a date sometime before the Quell!" Caesar says. "We'll call you when we have an idea and then you can give us your thoughts."

"Sounds great." Peeta says. I look up at him and I can see a hint of tears in his eyes but he's holding them back. Meanwhile, I let mine fall, I guess that's what girls do. They cry. It's not something I usually do but I guess I might have to get used to it. Peeta looks back at me and smiles then kisses me once more.

"Ladies and gentlemen, the Star-Crossed Lovers of District 12 and soon to be husband and wife, Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark!" Caesar ends the broadcast and Peeta and I walk off the stage. Waving at the crowd once more. When we're off stage, Peeta pulls me into a tight hug and I can feel the tears coming down his face. When we pull apart, I look up at him with happiness in my eyes. I'm overjoyed right now. Peeta is going to be my husband, I couldn't be happier.

"Was that interview as bad as you thought it would be?" He asks.

"No, no it wasn't." I reply. I hug him again. When we pull apart, I ask,

"How long have you been planning this?"

"Since a week before the Victory Tour started." He says. "I just want to spend the rest of my life with you, I asked Caesar if he would ask that question last so I could do it."

"How did you get in contact with Caesar before the interview?" I ask him.

"Somehow, Haymitch had his number so I called him before you woke up this morning." Peeta replies.

"You sure did put a lot of time into this." I tell him.

"I wanted to make it special, and the ring is one of a kind literally, I drew a design and gave it to the jewelers in District 12 to make and it was done within two days." He says. I look at my engagement ring, it's very simple, it's silver and has a diamond in the middle which is surrounded by small forest green emeralds. It's absolutely beautiful.

"I know you're not very fond of surprises but I hope this was a good one." Peeta says.

"The best surprise in my life." I tell him.

"Happy to hear it." He says. I see Effie coming towards us with an excited expression on her face.

"OH! Congratulations you two!" She squeals.

"Thank you, Effie." I say. Haymitch comes up next to Effie.

"Congratulations, sweetheart." He says.

"Thanks, Haymitch." I say. He walks over to Peeta, pats him on the back and says,

"Take care of her, lover boy."

"Trust me, I will." Peeta replies. I smile and look at him, he looks back at me and smiles. Effie interrupts,

"Sorry to ruin the happy moment but we have to head out for our day in the Capitol!"

I don't think Effie ruined the moment, I get to spend the whole day with Peeta, who is now my future husband, the day may be spent in the Capitol, but if I'm with Peeta, it doesn't matter.


	5. Chapter 5: The Capitol Party

**Chapter 5**

The Capitol Party

The entire day in the Capitol was pretty stressful. The entire day, no matter where Peeta and I went, the press would find us and ambush us with flashing of cameras and questions. At first I wasn't used to the camera flashed so I would cover my eyes but now that Peeta and I are so famous, we've both gotten pretty used to it. Now, we're in the Training Center where we were so many months ago for the Games. We're waiting for our prep teams to get here and prep us for the Capitol party tonight. Peeta and I are in the sitting room on the couch watching the Capitol News, his arm is around me as we watch the TV. Suddenly, Caesar's face appears on the screen.

"People of Panem, for those of you who weren't watching this morning, our two Star-Crossed Lovers, from District 12, have surprised us with a new twist in their love affair!" He says. "Let's take a look!" A video pops up on the screen behind him and he steps out of the way and the video plays. I relive Peeta's proposal. We've been engaged for the past six hours and I couldn't be happier right now. I look over at Peeta, he looks back at me, I smile at him, he smiles back and pulls me closer to him. I rest my head on his shoulder and Caesar continues,

"A fairytale ending, for two Star-Crossed Lovers. That's beautiful, beautiful." Then the screen goes black.

"I would relive that moment any day." I say to Peeta.

"I would too." He replies. He kisses my head, "Especially the part when you said 'yes'."

I smile and put my head back on his shoulder and he rubs small circles on my arm. I don't think I could be happier right now.

 **Gale's POV**

I'm finishing up in the mines trying to get as much dirt off of my hands as possible and I usually get the rest off when I get home, when the TV turns on and Caesar Flickerman appears on the screen he starts talking about what the people who weren't watching missed out on from the Star-Crossed Lover's of District 12, that catches my attention to I turn around and face the TV.

" _Let's take a look."_ Caesar says. He steps aside and a video begins to play. Not just any video, Peeta proposing to Katniss. She looked so shocked and happy and she had tears streaming down her face.

" _Yes, yes. Of course I'll marry you, Peeta!"_ Katniss says. She actually agreed? Ever since I met her she always talked about how she never wanted to get married or have kids. Now, the baker boy comes along and she's completely different. At first I thought the whole love story in the Games was all an act, but ever since she came home, I always see her with him. They're always holding hands and she's always smiling and laughing around him. I used to be the only person that could make her laugh and smile like that. Now, I only see her on most Sunday's when we hunt together. She hardly comes though because she's always with Peeta.

" _A fairytale ending, for two Star-Crossed Lovers. That's beautiful, beautiful."_ Caesar says and the TV turns off. I don't know what I feel right now. I don't know if I feel angry that she chose Baker Boy and not me, jealousy because of Baker Boy and how I hardly see Katniss anymore because of him, sadness because she loves Peeta and not me. I know she loves me, but she loves me like a brother, not a lover, or happiness because she found someone that makes her happy. I think I mostly feel angry, jealousy, and sadness at the same time. My mother with be excited, she'll be happy for Katniss, I guess I'm going to have to pretend to be happy for her, and get rid of any hope that she would ever love me the way she loves him.

 **(Back to Katniss POV)**

We're still waiting for our prep teams to arrive, what's taking them so long I have no idea. I'm braiding my hair for like the tenth time and I stop to admire my engagement ring again. I can't help how beautiful it looks. I feel Peeta wrap his arms around me and kiss my head.

"The ring is so beautiful, Peeta." I say.

"I knew you would want something simple because you don't like all the fancy stuff, so I had something simple made." He replies.

"I'm so happy you remembered how I am about fancy things. I mean yeah, some fancy things are pretty but not all if you know what I mean." I tell him.

He chuckles. "I know exactly what you mean." We hear a knock at the door.

"That must be the prep teams." Effie says, bursting into the room. She hurries over to the door and opens it. There stand Cinna, Portia, and my prep team.

"Sorry we took so long." Cinna apologizes.

"No worries, we have plenty of time to get them ready." Effie says. She steps aside and they all walk in. I walk over to Cinna and embrace him in a hug. I haven't seen him since the Victory Tour started, same with Flavius, Venia, and Octavia. I hug all of them and Peeta goes and hugs Portia. Venia, Flavius, and Octavia are all over Peeta and I about our engagement this morning. They're all admiring my engagement ring and they ask Peeta where he got it because they've never seen it at any jewelers before. When Peeta tells them he had it specially made for me, we here a lot of "aw's". Finally, Effie pipes up,

"Alright, now that we've caught up, it's time to start getting them ready. The party starts in three hours."

"Three hours?" Octavia exclaims. "We'll have her done in at least two and a half." He looks to Flavius and Venia.

"She'll be beautiful." Venia says. "Well, more beautiful than she already is." I smile at them. Portia takes Peeta to another room and I'm lead to a different room down the hall. I sit in the chair and listen to my prep team talk about Capitol nonsense while they prep me. They mostly talk about the latest fashion and hairstyles in the Capitol right now. They start to bring up mine and Peeta's wedding so I start to listen to what they're saying.

"Have you and Peeta worked out a date for the wedding yet?" Flavius asks.

"Well, I just got engaged today, so, no, but we're going to talk with Caesar about dates and then he'll talk to President Snow and get back to us." I reply.

"That sounds like a good plan to me." Octavia says.

"Have you thought about what flowers you want in your bouquet?" Venia asks.

"Not really, but now that you mention it, I want a bouquet of primroses." I reply.

"Those would make a lovely bouquet, Katniss." Flavius says.

"It looks like we're done." Octavia says. They step away to admire their work and they all nod.

"Cinna's turn." Flavius says. She, Venia, and Octavius leave the room and a few minutes later, Cinna walks in the room.

"You ready?" He asks.

"As ready as I'll ever be." I reply. He sits me down and does my makeup. When he finishes, he pulls out the garment bag that has my dress in it. I slip the dress on and Cinna zips it up. He turns me around and I look at myself in the mirror. Cinna has impressed me once again. The dress is black and it goes to my knees. I has red glitter all over so if I'm in certain lighting, I'm a mixture of black and red. The glitter represents fire hence I'm the "Girl On Fire." I think the dress is beautiful and to top it off, I'm wearing black flats with the same red glitter at the tips. I really love my outfit for tonight. I know Peeta will too, but Peeta always thinks I look beautiful so I wouldn't surprise me. My hair is down so the waves in it drape over my shoulders. I'm officially impressed. Cinna always impresses me though. I smile at him.

"I take it you like it?" He asks.

"I love it, it's beautiful." I say. "Everything you make is beautiful."

"Anything for the Girl On Fire." He says. Suddenly, Effie bursts into the room.

"OH! Katniss, dear, you look gorgeous, now, the party starts in thirty minutes so we must get going, Peeta is waiting for you down the hall and once we collect him, we have to head to the car." She says quickly.

"Ok, Effie." I reply. With that, I'm out the door.

When Peeta and I get in the car, and we can't see the flashing of the camera's, he says,

"You look beautiful tonight."

"You look absolutely handsome tonight." I reply.

"You two are adorable together." Effie says.

"Thanks, Effie." I say. A blush makes it's way up my face. Within a matter of minutes, we're pulling in behind the Presidential Palace where the party is being held in the humungous backyard. I can slightly see all of the Capitol guests everywhere, it makes me sick that all these people are celebrating Peeta and I killing other innocent people who were younger and older than us. It's disgusting. Peeta and I get out of the car hand in hand with Effie in front of us. She babbles on about how excited she is for tonight as we start to climb a small flight of stairs. When we reach the top, she stops and says,

"Breath it all in, children." She turns and faces us. "This is all for you."

"Looks cozy." Peeta says sarcastically.

"Attitude." Effie scolds him. She then turns back around and continues walking. We reach the party and there are all kinds of camera everywhere focused on Peeta and I.

We start talking to people and their Capitol accents get so annoying! Most of them congratulate Peeta and I on our engagement and we always thank them and they start asking us if we've started planning the wedding yet. We say not yet because we've only been engaged for like, six hours. I am literally so happy I don't even care about these stupid Capitolites. Peeta and I are getting married. I couldn't possibly be happier. Peeta is going to be my husband.

Soon it's time for the President to make a small speech and then there's a toast and dancing and more eating. Everyone turns and faces President Snow as he begins to speak,

"These two young, brave Victors could be no less than wonderful. We all adore them here in the Capitol and the Districts just love them." The crowd starts cheering. Snow begins to speak again, "I personally, want to congratulate them on the announcement of their engagement. Your love has inspired us." When he finishes the crowd cheers once more then he raises his glass and everyone drinks from their glasses. Then, fireworks start going off and everyone turns to look at them in awe. Peeta and I look at each other and smile, then we look back to the beautiful fireworks. When it comes to the dancing, I was surprised that I didn't step on Peeta's foot at all. After the party ends Effie brings us to the train station and we'll arrive back in 12 early in the morning. Peeta and I head to our compartment and get ready for bed. Once we've both showered, brushed our teeth, put pajamas on and I've put my hair back into a braid, we collapse on the bed and Peeta wraps his arms around me and I snuggle closer to him. Sleep is about to take over me when I hear Peeta whisper,

"Goodnight, future Mrs. Mellark." Then he kisses my head.

"Goodnight, Peeta." I whisper back sleepily, within minutes, I fall into a dreamless sleep.

 **I hope you're all enjoying the story so far! Chapter 6 should be up sometime either later this week or early next week! I'm trying to update weekly so I don't keep you waiting for too long. Anyways, I'm going to start to write Chapter 6 tomorrow and it will hopefully be finished before next week so I can post it next Monday or Tuesday! Thanks for reading and hope you have a good day! Love you all! (Also, I know that this chapter was kind of short but I honestly didn't really know how to describe the Capitol Party like the wonderfully talented Suzanne Collins but I tried my best at least. Next chapter should be up soon, I SHALL KEEP MY PROMISE! (I didn't promise anything but I'm making that promise NOW))**

 **~LetKatnissCatchFire**


	6. Chapter 6: Returning Home

**Chapter 6**

Returning Home

When Peeta and I wake up, we remember that we're FINALLY back in District 12. We jump out of bed and get ready for the day. We both shower, get dressed, brush out teeth and tame our sloppy hair. Once we're ready, we head to the dining cart and find Haymitch sitting there drinking as usual. We said goodbye to Effie before we left last night hence she lives in the Capitol and not in Twelve. She said she'll see us in a few months for the wedding and then again after that for the Quarter Quell. Peeta and I sit down and eat our breakfast pretty quickly. I guess we're both desperate to get back into Twelve. When we get off the train nearly half the District is there and clapping. My mother and Prim in the front of the crowd. Peeta and I smile and wave to everyone. I hug my mother and Prim and when I pull away I ask,

"How long have you guys been out here?"

"About three hours. Prim wanted to come earlier but I convinced her that we shouldn't." My mom says.

"I wanted to be here when the train arrived." Prim defends herself.

"Sorry Little Duck, but I agree with mom, it's still early winter, and it's too cold to be out here for too long." I say.

"Fine." Prim says. Peeta chuckled behind us. Prim goes over and hugs her future brother-in-law. Prim and Peeta have this special bond I don't really understand it but I love watching them laugh and joke around together. I think Peeta already thinks of Prim as his sister but once we get married, she'll be his sister-in-law. In a way, I think Peeta kind of always wanted a sister to joke around with. I'm happy Prim can fill that role perfectly. I can't help but smile at the thought. Surprisingly, my mother goes and hugs Peeta as well. It's nice to see her communicating with everyone again and actually having real emotion in her face.

"We should probably head home." My mom says.

"Okay." I say. I take Peeta's hand in mine and intertwine our fingers. My mom and Prim go into my Victor's house and Peeta and I go to his so we can just hang out like normal people because after two weeks of "touring" the country and big Capitol events, we could use the relaxation time. Besides, we're both only sixteen, all this stuff happening in our lives right now is a bit overwhelming, I'll admit. I wonder how Gale is taking this whole thing. **Gale**. I haven't seen him since he started working in the mines. I see him occasionally when he's out in town after his shift or on Sunday's his day off but we never interact anymore. It's not like I've wanted to, because I haven't. Everything just feels weird with Gale now and I just feel awkward when I'm around him so I just avoid him. I feel safer with Peeta anyway. Peeta gets it. Peeta understands me because we went through the same thing together. He knows what it feels like. He knows what the nightmares are like. He completely understands. The only people in District 12 who know what the arena is really like are Haymitch, Peeta and I.

I push the thought of the arena out of my mind and focus on Peeta. What did I do to deserve him? He's so kind, caring, and loving. He's just perfect. We sit on the couch and turn the TV on to see if there's anything interesting airing besides stupid Capitol TV shows. We find the live broadcast channel with Caesar and he starts talking about our engagement and our wedding. Then he says something that doesn't surprise me that much,

" _I've been informed that Katniss Everdeen will be given a Wedding Photo shoot and will be trying on five different dresses. Then, you, people of the Capitol will vote for your favorite and whichever dress gets the most votes, Katniss will wear to her wedding!"_ The crowd goes crazy and when they settle down, Caesar says,

" _In other news, the Reading of The Card for this years Quarter Quell will take place in exactly four weeks from now, that's two months before the Quell and two weeks from..."_ He takes a phone out and dials a number than Peeta's phone rings. I pick it up and put it on speaker,

"Hello?" I ask. I know it's Caesar though.

" _Katniss! Peeta! Are you watching the broadcast?"_ Caesar asks, his phone on speaker as well so the audience can hear.

"Yes, we're watching Caesar." Peeta replies.

" _Good, good."_ Caesar starts. _"_ _The President and I have discussed and we want to know if it's ok with you to have your wedding two weeks after the Reading of The Card?"_

I look at Peeta, we both nod and smile. "That sounds like a lovely idea Caesar. I can't think of a better time to have it." I say into the phone. I can hear the crowd cheer through the phone and on the TV.

" _OH! That's wonderful! Well, we'll see you two in a little while for your wedding!"_ Caesar says.

"Bye, Caesar!" Peeta says.

"See you soon, Caesar." I say.

" _Goodbye! It was lovely chatting with you!"_ Caesar says and then he hangs up and looks to the crowd in the TV.

" _Ya hear that folks?"_ Caesar starts. _"_ _We'll see our favorite couple in just a few short weeks!"_ The crows goes crazy again and when they dial down, Caesar says his goodbyes and the broadcast ends.

"That was interesting." Peeta says when I turn the TV off.

"Yeah, that was really interesting." I reply.

"I like the time they set the wedding for." Peeta says.

"Me too. I think it's pretty perfect." I reply.

Peeta goes and makes hot chocolate and when he comes back and sits on the couch and when he hands me my mug, I snuggle close to him and he puts his arm around me. We sit and drink our hot chocolate in a comfortable silence and I can't help but think I was destined to be with the blond haired, blue eyed, man that loves me, and I love him.

 _ **The Reading of The Card**_

Today id the day we've all been dreading for the past month. The Reading of The Card, to find out what crazy, stupid thing the President has for the Third Quarter Quell this year. Everyone's electricity in the Seam will be turned on today so their holographic TV's can work and the Reading of The Card can be seen by everyone. Peeta and I are in his house, which will be OUR house in two weeks. Wow, our wedding is in two weeks already? Where has time gone? Anyways, we're sitting on the couch in the living room, it's almost two o'clock and that's when the time the Reading was scheduled for. The TV automatically turns on and President Snow walks up to the podium.

" _It is time for the Reading of The Card for the 75_ _th_ _Annual Hunger Games and the Third Quarter Quell."_ Snow says. A little boy, probably around the age of fourteen, brings a box to President Snow and he take out the card that says 75 on it and hands it to him while the crowd cheers. When they quiet down, Snow reads the card,

" _For this celebration of the 75_ _th_ _Annual Hunger Games, to show that during the Dark Days, many, many people people fought solo, with no protection, volunteering is FORBIDDEN."_

I freeze. I feel Peeta tense up behind me, no volunteering? That means Peeta and I could end up mentoring a twelve year old. Out of nowhere, I feel tears make their way down my face and I cry silently into his shirt. I don't want to mentor a twelve year old, I'm sure neither of us do. When I calm down, we just sit there holding each other. It's comforting. I wish I didn't have to mentor anyone, but as everyone in the country knows that's not how it works. I'm a Victor so I have to mentor Tributes. Not how I expected my life to turn out when I was younger. It doesn't matter now. At least I have Peeta with me. If he wasn't here, I don't know what I'd do. I snuggle closer to Peeta, he kisses my head and I sigh, closing my eyes. Finally, I speak,

"We might have to mentor a twelve year old, Peeta."

"I know." He starts. "I don't want to think about that just as much as you do." He's right. I don't want to think about it, but I do think about it, and I'm going to think about it every year before the Reaping.

"I wish I could stop thinking about it." I reply quietly.

"So do I." He says. He starts rubbing my arm. We sit in silence. A comfortable silence. Peeta just rubs circles on my arm with his thumb and I caress is upper arm gently. Neither of us know what to say. This is the first time I've seen Peeta rendered speechless. I look at Peeta's face, he looks concentrated like he's thinking of something to say. Finally, he speaks,

"Let's try to look on the bright side." He says softly. "We have our wedding to look forward to in the next two weeks."

"True." I say smiling. Peeta smiles back at me. "I don't know if I can wait two more weeks though."

He chuckles. "I'm not sure if I can either."

"Well, we agreed to it, so we have to follow through." I say. "Why didn't we suggest ONE week after?"

Peeta chuckles. "I have no idea, maybe we were too caught up in the moment."

I giggle. "That sounds about right." I joke. We both laugh, I'm still thinking about possibly mentoring a twelve year old, but I just know that with Peeta with me, if we do have to mentor a twelve year old, we'd have each other's backs through it all. I'd probably break down a lot more so Peeta might comfort me more than I comfort him. Suddenly, I remember something,

"Cinna, and the others will be here in three days for that wedding dress photoshoot." I say.

"I completely forgot about that." Peeta says.

"So did I until just now." I say giggling. Peeta chuckles.

"How many dresses are they bringing again?" He asks.

"Five." I say. "All designed and created by Cinna, which I'm happy about."

"Same here. Who knows what those other stylists would make for you?" He says jokingly. We both laugh, Peeta goes to the kitchen and makes us hot chocolate. We sit on the couch in a comfortable silence just sipping on out hot chocolate. I can't help but wish we could stay like this forever.

 **So, short but sweet chapter. What did you guys think of the whole "No volunteering" thing? I thought that would make it interesting. Please don't hate me when I post Chapter 8 because Chapter 8 is the Reaping and I don't think you'll like my choice of Tributes. ;) Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter, the next chapter is the wedding! Hopefully, I'll finish it and be able to post it on Thursday or Friday! Stay tuned!**

 **~LetKatnissCatchFire**


	7. Chapter 7: The Wedding

**Chapter 7**

The Wedding

Today, Cinna and my prep team arrive today in District 12 for my Wedding Photoshoot. I don't even know what the dresses look like, all I know is that there are five of them. I get that this is all for my wedding, and I'm more than excited for it, but I don't like the fact that I won't be able to pick the dress, the dumb Capitolites get to decide. Oh, how I wish I could just pick the dress by myself.

Peeta is at the bakery visiting his family (mostly his dad and brothers) right now and I'm in the woods. I'm not hunting but I have my bow and arrows just in case, ever since the Games, I cling to my bow and arrows more tightly because sometimes, when I hear a twig snap, or any sound for that matter, I always jump and get an arrow loaded ready to shoot. I flashback to when the Careers were hunting me. One time, about a week after we got home, I was out here hunting and saw some turkeys. I went to shoot one of them and as soon as the arrow flew, I saw the arrow I shot into Marvel's chest in the arena. I dropped my bow an arrows and started screaming not being able to get the image out of my head. I sprinted back to the Victor's Village, I wasn't too far from my house when I collapsed to the ground and began screaming and shaking. It wasn't too long until Peeta burst through his front door. When he saw me, he sprinted towards me and knelt down beside me.

" _Katniss, what's wrong? What happened?"_ He asked.

" _I...I..."_ I tried to tell him, but the image was still flooding in my mind and as soon as I tried to tell him, I began to scream even more. Peeta's eyes were filled with worry, he picked me up and took me to Haymitch's house.

" _Haymitch! I need your help!"_ Peeta yelled. Haymitch appeared into sight and once he saw me, his face filled with worry too and I was still screaming my head off.

" _What happened to Katniss?"_ He asked Peeta.

" _I don't know, I was hoping you knew."_ Peeta replied.

" _Bring her into the living room."_ Haymitch said. Peeta obeyed and brought my hand to my head and grasped my hair, pulling on it tightly and squeezed my eyes shut. My screaming continued, I didn't open my eyes and my hands never let go of my head.

" _Haymitch, what's happening to her?"_ Peeta asked. His voice shaky and filled with concern. Haymitch watched me as I continued what I was doing.

" _She's having a flashback."_ Haymitch whispered to himself. Peeta noticed he whispered but didn't hear him.

" _What's happening?"_ He asked again. I finally opened my eyes, but kept screaming and gripping my head, Haymitch turned to Peeta and said,

" _She's having a flashback, Peeta."_ Haymitch told him.

" _A flashback?"_ Peeta questioned.

" _She's seeing something that she did or happened to her in the Games."_ Haymitch started. _"She triggered it somehow but it's clear she doesn't want to talk now. I've seen another Victor have flashbacks before, but never this bad. They'd usually just stare at the wall and start to hyperventilate. I've never seen anything like this before."_

" _How can I help her?"_ Peeta asked.

" _Remind her of where she is and that she's safe, tell her whatever she's seeing isn't real and she's actually home in District 12."_ Haymitch said.

" _Ok, thanks Haymitch."_ Peeta said.

" _No problem, kid."_ Haymitch said. _"Now, fix this little problem."_ Haymitch walked to the other room and Peeta knelt in front of me, my eyes had squeezed shut again. Peeta took one of my hands in his,

" _Katniss, it's ok. We're home, safe in District 12."_ He started. I started screaming less and Peeta continued. _"Whatever you're seeing right now Katniss, it isn't real, we're home and we're safe. Please, come back to me, Katniss."_ I stopped screaming, I released my grip on my head, I continued to shake and kept my eyes closed. Breathing heavily.

" _That's it, Katniss. Come on, it's not real, we're safe."_ Peeta said. I stopped shaking but continued to breath heavily, the image of my arrow in Marvel's chest after he killed Rue almost completely gone from my fresh thoughts.

" _You're almost there, Katniss. Come on, come back to me."_ Peeta said. My breathing returned to normal and I opened my eyes and they locked with Peeta's beautiful blue eyes. Staring back at me.

" _Katniss? Are you ok?"_ Peeta asked. I just threw myself into his arms and embraced him and cried into his shirt. He stroked my hair and after I finally calmed down, Peeta asked me,

" _Katniss, what were you seeing?"_

" _My arrow lodged in Marvel's chest after he killed Rue."_ I replied quietly. Then Haymitch walked in.

" _How you doing, sweetheart?"_ He asked.

" _I'm better."_ I replied.

" _Good. Now, you should go home and get some rest, flashbacks are very tiring I hear."_ Haymitch said.

" _You've never had a flashback, Haymitch?"_ Peeta asked.

" _Not every Victor get's them, kid."_ Haymitch started. _"Katniss here is one of the unlucky Victor's here and get's flashbacks. Worst part is, the other Victor that gets them doesn't have them that bad, like I said, the other one who gets flashbacks, just stares into space and hyperventilates."_ With that, we said our goodbyes and Peeta said thank you to Haymitch and took me to his house and settled us on the couch. I laid my head back onto his chest and he wrapped his arms around me. Before I knew it, I was asleep.

I'm surprised I didn't have any flashbacks on the Victory Tour, Haymitch and Peeta were worried about that, as was I, but for some reason, I didn't have any flashbacks and nothing went wrong except for my three blackouts. In the months before the Victory Tour, I had all kinds of flashbacks, even the littlest things triggered them. One time I was skinning a squirrel on my back porch, and when I started skinning it, some of the blood got on my hand and when I saw it, I started seeing two images, Rue's blood pouring out of her stomach, and Peeta's leg when he had blood poisoning. I started screaming and crying, my eyes slammed shut and my hands automatically flew to my head and I collapsed onto the porch. My mother and Prim ran out to see what was wrong for they had never witnessed one of my flashbacks before. Prim tried calming me down but I couldn't really see her, I opened my eyes for a split second and when I saw her, I immediately saw Rue and started screaming louder, the images of Peeta and Rue fresh in my mind.

" _Mom, go get Peeta. Maybe he knows what's happening."_ Prim said. I heard my mother walk out and the front door open and close. Not long after she left, she was back with Peeta.

" _What's happening to her, Peeta?"_ Prim asked. Her voice shaky and I knew she was crying.

" _She's having a flashback."_ Peeta said.

" _A flashback?"_ My mother questioned.

" _Sometimes, when Katniss does or sees something that reminds her of something that happened to her in the Games, that image becomes fresh in her mind and she can't get rid of it unless someone brings he back"_ Peeta said. He scooped me up and started telling me we were safe and that it wasn't real and we were home in 12. After a few minutes, I was out of the flashback and I clung to Peeta like he was my lifeline. Technically, he is because if he died than I would die too. I can't live without him. Anyway, back to the present.

I'm just standing here doing nothing so I might as well go home. I make my way out of the woods and back to my house in the Village. I look at the clock, I still have about two hours until Cinna and the others arrive. I go outside onto my front porch and just sit on the porch swing lost in my thoughts. I think about my life, the Games, my wedding, mostly the Games. I can't seem to get them off my mind now. I should be focusing on my wedding in a few weeks. I start to think about everything that happened in the arena. I slowly walk down my porch steps and look at the flowers planted in the front of it. I kneel down and pick a single flower, then, I remember Rue and how I covered her in flowers when she died. I shriek and drop to the ground, curl up into a ball, I squeeze my eyes shut and grasp my head as I scream.

 **Peeta's POV**

I'm walking home from my visit to the bakery. I was nice to see my father and brothers, I haven't seen seen them that much with the Victory Tour and spending most of my time with Katniss. I still can't believe Katniss and I will be married in two weeks. I smile at the thought of Katniss being my wife. Of course I always dreamed of it when I was little, but now it's becoming a reality. I pass under the entrance to the Victor's Village and I see Katniss walk down her porch steps and look at her flowers in front of her house. I watch as she kneels down and picks a flower and she just stares at it, I begin to wonder what's going through her head. Then it hits me. **Rue.** Oh no. I hear Katniss scream and I immediately call for Haymitch as I run to Katniss's shaking body. Haymitch comes bolting out of his door, when he sees Katniss, he starts running to her too. He's closer so he gets there first, we both kneel down and Haymitch talks to Katniss.

"Katniss? Sweetheart? Can you hear me?" He asks. "Katniss, can you hear me sweetheart?" She continues to scream and shake and she grips her head tighter. I always feel bad for Katniss because the nightmares are bad enough and now Katniss will suffer with these flashbacks probably for the rest of her life. She starts moving her mouth and Haymitch breaks me out of my thoughts,

"At least she's not screaming as much, but what is she saying?" I lean down close to her so I can hear what she's saying.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Rue. I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She whispers.

"Just as I thought." I say when I sit back up. Haymitch looks at me with confusion. I find the flower Katniss picked and show it to him, he immediately catches on and knows she's seeing Rue's lifeless body covered in wild flowers right now. Katniss starts screaming again and louder than before, I hate seeing her like this, I hate seeing her in any kind of pain or suffering. I pick her up and carry her inside her house, still screaming and grasping her head. Her eyes squeezed shut. I set her in the couch and kneel beside her and whisper into her ear,

"Come back to me, Katniss. It's not real, whatever you're seeing right now isn't real. You're home in District 12, you're safe and no one can hurt you anymore." I continue repeating those words and she begins to calm down so I keep going. She always comes back to me. Always.

 **Katniss POV**

First, I'm seeing Rue's lifeless body covered in the wild flowers. Next, I'm seeing Clove, she looks at Rue and kicks her lifeless body. She gets out one of her knives and starts slicing Rues skin. The rest of her blood leaving her body. I want to scream at Clove and fight her, but I can't seem to do anything and I can't move. I can't even blink. I can only watch as Clove tears through Rue's perfect skin with her stupid knife. I start crying. Sobbing. I couldn't protect her. I couldn't keep her alive.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Rue. I'm sorry, I'm sorry." I hear myself say.

After what feels like hours of crying I hear something. No, someone. The voice sounds very familiar.

"Come back to me, Katniss. It's not real. Whatever you're seeing right now isn't real. You're home in District 12, you're safe and no one can hurt you anymore." The voice's words echo through the arena. Wait. I know that voice anywhere. Peeta. That's Peeta. Where is he? I can hear him, but I can't see him. I must be in a flashback. It all comes back, I was looking at the flowers in front of my house and went into a flashback. How did Peeta get to me so fast? He must've been on his way home from the bakery and heard me scream. I start to calm down and then I hear another voice.

"Peeta, she's been like this for more than thirty minutes. What if she never comes back?" The voice says. I know that voice all to well. Prim. She must be so worried. I can't even imagine how worried Peeta probably is.

"She'll come back, Prim." Peeta starts. "She always comes back." I hear my mother call Prim to the kitchen and Peeta sighs with what sounds like relief. I'm guessing he doesn't like Prim seeing me like this. I'm still clutching my head and have my eyes squeezed shut but at least I'm not shaking anymore.

"Haymitch, what are we supposed to do, this is the longest flashback she's ever had." Peeta says in a shaky voice.

"I don't know, kid. If she doesn't come back in the next ten minutes, the Wedding Photoshoot will have to wait until tomorrow." Haymitch says.

I still see myself in the arena but I know that I'm home thanks to Peeta. I don't see Rue anymore, instead, I'm alone. Rue is gone and I'm all alone in the arena. There's no one else here but me. I know that I'm at home, but I don't feel like I'm at home. I still feel like I'm trapped in the arena and I can't get out. That's when the tears come.

 **Peeta POV**

Katniss has been lost in a flashback for over and hour, we had to tell Cinna and the others when they arrived that the photoshoot had to wait until tomorrow because Katniss wasn't feeling well. Her prep team bought it but Cinna looked a little unconvinced. Katniss will tell him everything when she feels like doing so. I go back into the living room where Katniss is still laying on the couch, her hands still clutching her head but at least she's not screaming anymore. I sit in the chair next to the couch and stare down at the floor. Haymitch comes and sits in the chair next to mine and he keeps an eye on Katniss. After about five minutes of silence, Haymitch speaks up.

"Hey, Peeta look." He says, tapping my shoulder. I look up at him.

"What is it?" I ask.

"Look at her." He says, pointing to Katniss. I turn and look at her. Her hands are no longer grasping her head, one is draped over her stomach and the other is draped over her forehead. I notice something though. She's crying. She has tears streaming down her face. I can tell she saw more than Rue's dead body, she had to have seen something else that made her scream like that. I jump off the chair and kneel beside her.

"Katniss?" I whisper. "Katniss, can you hear me?" She shifts a little. That's the first time she's moved in the past hour besides all the shaking. She's slowly coming back. I look over and see Haymitch watching us with a look in his eyes. His eyes are filled with worry. I can tell mine are too. I look back at Katniss and she twitches slightly. I wonder what she's seeing now. Her eyes are still squeezed shut. I reach out and grab her hand that's draped over her stomach and hold it in mine, making little circles on the back of her hand.

"Katniss?" I say softly. "Katniss, can you hear me? Katniss?" I kiss the back of her hand softly.

"I love you, Katniss. Please come back to me." I say. No response. I sit there and hold her hand in mine and intertwine our fingers. After a few minutes of silence, I hear her voice.

"I love you too, Peeta." She whispers hoarsely. My head shoots up and I look at her. My eyes wide. I see Haymitch's eyes are wide as well.

"Katniss?" I say softly. "Katniss? Can you hear me?"

"I love you, Peeta." She whispers. I look down at her and her eyes that were tightly closed a few seconds ago, loosen up and her eyes flutter open.

"Katniss?" I say.

"Peeta." She says hoarsely and she quickly sits up and embraces me. I feel the tears streaming down her cheeks as they soak my shirt. It take me a minute to realize that I'm crying too. After a few minutes of embracing each other, we tell her how long she was out of it for and that the photoshoot was moved to tomorrow and she tells us everything she saw in her flashback. I wince when she starts talking about when she saw Clove slicing Rue. Then she said she heard my voice but was still in the flashback and there was no one else in the arena but her. That's when she started crying because she thought she was completely alone and felt trapped. I hold her tight and wish she didn't have to live with the horror of those images in her mind. I wish I could prevent those images from entering her head, but I know that I never can.

 **Wedding Day (Katniss POV)**

Well, today is the day! I'm getting married to Peeta! I'm feeling many things right now, nervous, excited, happy and eager are a few. I'm nervous because what girl wouldn't be? Excited because I'm getting married, happy because I'm marrying Peeta and I'm eager to be walking down the isle already so I can see my soon to be husband. Our wedding is here in the Capitol of course but when we get home, Peeta and I will have our toasting at his house which will soon be our house hence I'm moving in with him (obviously).

My prep team have already brought be back to beauty base zero (it's stupid if you ask me). Now I'm in my room here in a Capitol hotel and Cinna brings my dress in. It's surprisingly pretty simple for being picked by the Capitolites. It's the traditional white color and has white feathers from the waist down. Sequence and small feathers cover the dress from the waist up. I have a feather hair piece with small diamonds in the middle. My hair is down and brushed and it drapes over my shoulders. Effie surprisingly let me wear flats instead of heels but of course my shoes are sparkly too. Cinna does my makeup and it's very minimal. He conceals my dark circles, lines my eyes in black, puts gold eyeshadow on my eyelids and applies a light pink blush all over my face. Finally, it's time for the wedding to start. I asked Haymitch if he would walk me down because he's been like a father to me.

"You ready to go, sweetheart?" He asks as he enters the room. All dressed up in a nice clean suit and very sober as he's been since we got back.

"I'm as ready as I'll ever be, Haymitch." I answer.

"Wedding jitters?" He asks.

"Yup." I say.

"Try this," He starts. "When those doors open and we start walking down the isle, focus on Peeta and don't look at anyone else, it might calm you."

"I hope that helps." I say. "If it doesn't, don't let me fall."

"Never in a million years, sweetheart." He says. "Now come on, we gotta go."

I slip my arm through his and we make our way down the hall. This is it. As soon as that music starts, I'll be walking down the isle. I'll become Katniss Mellark. Katniss Mellark. I like the sound of it. I smile at the thought and Haymitch and I reach the doors. We stand there for a few minutes and then the music starts and the doors open. This is it. My life is about to change forever. I'm about to become the wife of Peeta Mellark.

Once the doors open all the way, Haymitch and I make our way down the isle. My eyes lock with Peeta's and I swear I've never seen a bigger smile on his face. He looks at me in complete adoration and I can't help but smile back. I can already feel the tears in my eyes as I make my way closer to him. I really think we're walking too slow and it's taking me everything I am not to run up to Peeta right now. When we finally reach the altar, Haymitch places my hands in Peeta's and smiles at both of us before he goes and takes his seat. I look into Peeta's eyes the entire ceremony and when I say my vows, the love in my voice is crystal clear.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife," The Pastor starts, he turns to Peeta, "Peeta, you may kiss your bride."

"Don't mind if I do." Peeta says. Then our lips are locked and cheers and applause fill the room. This is our first kiss as husband and wife. I'm no longer Katniss Everdeen. I'm Katniss Mellark. I don't think I could be any happier than I am right now. When Peeta and I break apart, we look into the crowd and then make our way back down the isle and to the Wedding Reception that awaits us in the humungous dining hall.

 **Peeta POV**

Katniss is my wife now. I'm living my dream right now. I've dreamed of marrying Katniss ever since I was five and heard her sing at school. When I first fell head over heels in love with her. Katniss and I are waiting outside the doors of the dining hall waiting to be introduced. Everyone that was in the audience at the ceremony has to be in the dining hall before they introduce us. The only people in the audience that Katniss and I know that names of are her mother, Prim, my mom, dad, and brothers, Cinna, Portia and both of our prep teams, and even a few of the former Victor's, all the others were invited by President Snow. All of Panem was in the audience ass well because our wedding was broadcasted live all over the country.

"You look beautiful today." I tell Katniss.

"You don't look so bad yourself." She replies. We both smile and I take her hand in mine.

"I still can't believe this is real. We're really married." I say.

"Believe it Peeta," She starts. "This is all real." She smiles more and kisses my cheek and our names are finally called.

"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome our newlyweds, Peeta and Katniss Mellark!" The announcer says. The doors open and Katniss and I walk into the room and everyone starts clapping and cheering for us. We take our seats at the front table and some people make speeches, like Prim, Haymitch, Finnick O'dair surprisingly and then dinner is announced. The meal of the evening is lamb stew and dried plums (Katniss's favorite), white toasted bread with butter and the of course there's the snack bar filled with sandwiches, fruits, drinks, etc. Katniss and I share many laughs, smiles and kisses throughout the meal. Then comes the cake.

 **Katniss's POV**

Peeta and I are having the best time, laughing, smiling and sharing multiple kisses throughout our dinner. We're in the middle of laughing when the announcer says it's time to cut the cake. We get up and make our way to the dessert table where the cake is. The one thing I don't like about this whole reception is that Peeta didn't make the cake. He would've been more creative but this cake just has plain white icing and edible pearls around the edges. To think, the Capitolites are crazy with clothes, makeup, and hair and all that and when it comes to their foods, they're pretty simple. Of course the cake still looks good and all but I wish Peeta would've made it. I take the knife in my hand and Peeta places his hand over mine and we cut each other and piece of cake. We feed each other a bite and I laugh a little when I put icing on Peeta's nose. He wipes it off and quickly does the same to me before I even know what's happening. We both burst out laughing as I wipe the icing off my nose and everyone else enjoys their cake. After we finish our desert, I lay my head on Peeta's shoulder and he wraps his arm around me and kisses my head. We sit like that for a while in a comfortable silence just enjoying each other's presence. After everyone finished their desert, the announcer says it's time for the bride and grooms first dance. Peeta and I get up and make our way to the dance floor. The DJ starts playing a slow song and we start dancing slowly to the music. After a few minutes of dancing, I lean forward and place my head on Peeta's chest and wrap my arms around him. He wraps his arms around me and holds me close as we sway back and forth to the music. This night couldn't be any more perfect. Soon everyone else is allowed to dance too but even as the music changes, Peeta and I just stay as we are wrapped in each other's embrace. Savoring every single moment.

 **It's only one day late so I wouldn't say I'm that bad. The next chapter is the reaping so brace yourselves.**

 **~LetKatnissCatchFire**


	8. Chapter 8: The Reaping

**Chapter 8**

The Reaping

When Peeta and I get home from the Capitol, we have our toasting at his house and then I move all of my stuff to his house. Since I didn't own much before our Games and I had little things I kept from the Capitol referring to clothing, it didn't take long. Also, because he lives right across the street from my old house, it wasn't a long walk to carry the boxes that had hardly anything in them. When I finished unpacking my things (which didn't take long either), Peeta and I just collapsed on the couch together and fell asleep there hence we arrived back in the District around three in the morning. We moved my stuff over at five in the morning and I finished unpacking at six. Then we just fell asleep on the couch and didn't wake up until four in the afternoon.

I'm frightened today. I might go into a severe flashback today. Today is the Reaping of the Quarter Quell and I really hope Peeta and I don't have to mentor a twelve year old, or thirteen year old for that matter. I really just want to get this day over with but I have to deal with the Quarter Quell for two weeks. Ugh. I can already tell these two weeks are going to be full of flashbacks. I'm broken from my thoughts when I feel someone tap my shoulder.

"Katniss?" I turn and find Peeta standing behind me, I'm just standing here in the middle of the room staring at nothing.

"Are you ok?" He asks.

"Yeah, I think so." I reply. "I'm just... hoping I don't have a flashback in the middle of the Reaping." Peeta gives me a sympathetic look and pulls me into his embrace.

"Me too, but we can only hope for the best." He says. He kisses my head and there's a knock on the door. We break apart and Peeta goes to answer the door. When he comes back, he has Haymitch behind him. Haymitch looks me in the eye.

"What is it?" I ask.

"It's time to go, sweetheart." He says. It's time to go the Reaping. It's time for me to become a mentor for the first time ever. I can't imagine how Peeta feels about mentoring someone and then sending them to their death. The very thought makes me shudder and Peeta and Haymitch eye me to make sure I'm not about to go into a flashback. I take a deep breath and finally speak,

"Okay, let's go. We don't want to be late or Effie will lecture all of us on time management." That causes them to smile and I do too and we head out the door.

When we reach the Justice Building, we're guided to the stage and sit by Mayor Undersee. I watch as all the boys and girls sign-in and make their way to the age assigned areas. I notice a specific head of blond hair, Prim's hair is in two braids again and she's wearing something way nicer than she wore last year. With all of my Victor's winnings, I can buy so many things that we could never afford before. She makes her way to the section for thirteen year old girls and she looks almost as scared as she was last year because if she's picked again (which is unlikely), there's no one to volunteer for her even if someone wanted to hence volunteering is forbidden. I think back to when Prim was first Reaped last year and I remember her exact screams when I took her place. I feel my eyes widen and I start breathing heavily. I'm trying not to scream so I squeeze my eyes shut. My hands fly to my head and I start shaking. I grit my teeth and try to contain my scream as best I can. I don't fully succeed and I let out a small, quiet cry and get the attention of Peeta and Haymitch who were talking with the Mayor. They're both by my side within five seconds.

 **Peeta POV**

Haymitch and I are talking with Mayor Undersee about what's been going on in the District when we hear a small, quirt cry. Haymitch and I snap our attention to wear the cry came from and we see Katniss gripping her head like there's no tomorrow, she's shaking and trying to contain her screams so she doesn't draw any attention. She's trying to fight it. She's fighting the flashback. Haymitch and I are by her side in seconds, her eyes are squeezed shut but they occasionally open and it's only for a split second and then they're squeezed shut again. I can't believe she's actually fighting the flashback.

"Haymitch, has the other Victor with flashbacks ever tried to fight them?" I ask. He shakes is head.

"No. She's never even thought about trying to fight her flashbacks. She thinks they're impossible to fight on her own." He says. "I've never seen anything like this." I turn back to Katniss and rub circle son her back.

"That's it, Katniss." I say. "Fight it. You can do it." She continues to shake and the grip on her head tightens. She releases another strangled cry and I can see tears make their way down her face. What is she seeing? I wish I could tell what she was seeing so I could help her through it better.

"Is she alright?" Mayor Undersee asks.

"It's just a flashback, she'll be alright." Haymitch tells him.

"A flashback?" He questions.

"I'll explain later." Haymitch says. He nods and sits back down. I lean in so I can whisper in Katniss's ear.

"Katniss, what your seeing isn't real. I know you can fight this because you're doing it. You're fighting it. Come back to me, Katniss. You can do it. It's not real, Katniss. Come back." I say. Her hands slowly fall from her head, she stops shaking and her eyes loosen. Tears still slide down her face but the stop eventually and then her eyes flutter open and stare into mine. She falls from her chair into my embrace and I wrap my arms protectively around her. Her arms wrap around my neck and she cries into my shirt. When she calms down, Haymitch asks,

"What were you seeing, sweetheart?"

"Prim." She answers quietly. I should've known. She probably saw Prim in the crowd of kids and it sent her back to when she volunteered and Prim screamed like crazy. That has to be it.

"You fought it pretty well." I tell her. She looks at me confused.

"I fought it? I don't remember trying to fight it." She says.

"You contained you screams there pretty well, sweetheart." Haymitch says.

"Wow, I didn't even realize I was trying to fight it." She says.

"You would open your eyes occasionally, too." I tell her.

"I do remember that, but than the image of Prim would get worse and I'd close them again." She says. "I saw myself too, when they called Prim's name, I didn't do anything about it and I watched her die in the bloodbath."

"Shh. It's ok, Katniss. It wasn't real." I tell her and hug her again.

"I know." She starts. "I know it wasn't real, but I can never tell what's real and what's not when I flashback to those times." I hate that Katniss has to deal with these flashbacks. No one should have to deal with them but Katniss and some other female Victor get them. These flashbacks must be pretty rare if only two Victors get them and the Hunger Games have been around for seventy-five years now. Katniss sits back in her chair and I take my spot next to her and Haymitch sits next to me and Mayor Undersee sits next to him. The Reaping officially starts and the Mayor gets up and reads the Treaty of Treason and then that stupid video they play every year plays once again. After the video, Effie walks onto the stage, and the scary part comes. This years Tributes are about to be chosen.

 **Katniss POV**

I've been dreading this day since the Reading of The Card. Volunteering is forbidden this year and I'm worried about who may be selected. God forbid it be a twelve year old. Effie steps up to the microphone and the scary part just comes closer and closer. Finally, it's time to pick the Tributes.

"As always, ladies first." Effie says. She walks over to the female reaping bowl and digs around a little before she finally grabs a slip of paper and walks back to the microphone.

"The female tribute, from District 12..." She starts. "Madge Undersee." I gasp and grip Peeta's hand. I watch a very terrified Madge make her way to the stage. She stands next to Effie and turns to face the crowd. If I think about it, Madge and I were kind of silent friends. We always hung around each other but never spoke. I look over at Mayor Undersee and see that his face is pale and he looks shocked, scared, and worried. I notice Peeta is looking at me, watching to see how I'll react. I look him in the eye and nod reassuring him that I'm ok, he nods back and we look back to the crowd of people. Effie can't ask for volunteers this year so she just gets on with it.

"Now, for the boys." She says. She walks over to the boys Reaping bowl and pulls out another slip of paper, then walks back over to the microphone.

"The male Tribute, from District 12..." She starts.

"Rory Hawthorne."

I immediately freeze. My eyes search for Rory in the crowd and I find him walking up to the stage with horror all over his face. I hear a girl scream "NO!" My eyes look in the direction the scream came from only to find that it was Prim that screamed and she was now sobbing her eyes out. Rory is her best friend and now he has to face the horrors of the Hunger Games. I feel bad for Rory and Madge. Neither of them deserve to go into the Games. Nobody does really, but when are the odds in anybody's favor here in District 12? Or in any District for that matter? I now realize that I'm breathing heavily. Am I hyperventilating? I must be. I can already see Rory in the arena, I see many images actually. I see Rory being killed many different ways, I see him dying from natural causes like dehydration or blood poisoning. I see Rory winning the Games and waking from nightmares in the night. It's taking everything I am not to scream. I suddenly let go of Peeta's hand and I try to resist the urge to bring them to my head. My hands are shaking as they slowly try to make there way up to my head. This can't be a flashback. None of those things happened to Rory in the past. But, if this isn't a flashback, what is this? Peeta notices very quickly and whispers in my ear to try and calm me down but nothing works. My hands are still making there way to my head. Ready to yank on my hair like there's no tomorrow. Finally, the Reaping is over and we all go back inside the Justice Building. Once we're inside and the doors are closed, I finally let loose. My eyes automatically squeeze shut, my hands fly to my head and I let out a loud, petrified scream. My knees give out on me and I collapse onto them onto the floor. I can feel myself losing consciousness. The last things I register is someone screaming my name and strong arms wrapping around me before I slip into the darkness.

 **Peeta POV**

As soon as Rory's name is called, Katniss immediately freezes in place. I look at her to see how she'll react, she seems to be looking in the crowd for him and then she sees him making his way to the stage. Suddenly, someone screams "NO!" I look to the direction of the scream and see that it was Prim and she was now sobbing. That sounds too familiar to the scream she made last year when Katniss volunteered for her. Speaking of Katniss, I look over to her to see if a flashback has been triggered. She's staring into space and also hyperventilating. She let's go of my hand and I watch as her shaky hands slowly try to make their way to her head. I lean in and try to calm her down. It's a miracle she's not screaming yet. I don't think this is a flashback though. Katniss breaths heavily when she has a flashback, but she never hyperventilates. This has to be something else. What is it though? Her hands are still trying to make their way to her head, to yank on her hair like there's no tomorrow. The Reaping finally ends and we had back inside the Justice Building, Madge and Rory are taken to their separate rooms so they can say their goodbyes. I'm about to ask Katniss what's wrong when I see her hands fly to her head, her eyes automatically squeeze shut and she let's out the most petrifying scream I've ever heard from her. She falls to her knees and Haymitch and I instantly run over to her.

"Katniss!" I yell. I'm by her side in a minute and Haymitch is on his knees in front of her. I wrap my arms around her and try talking into her ear. Her screams dial down and I think that she's calming down, but when her screams stop and she doesn't move, I look at Haymitch.

"What happened? Is she okay?" I ask. He looks down at Katniss's face and he moves some hair from her face to get a better look. Shock immediately crosses his face for a split second and then hi face is serious again. I instantly begin to worry. Is she okay? Haymitch looks back at me, fear and concern in his eyes.

"I don't know if she's okay, kid." He says quietly. I almost didn't hear him.

"What do you mean you don't know if she's okay?" I ask him.

"I mean I don't know if she's okay." He starts. "She's unconscious."

"How is she unconscious? Wha-what?" I stutter.

"I don't know." Haymitch starts. "But what I do know, is that we have to get her to her mother. Pick her up and let's go." But before we leave, I have to ask him this.

"Haymitch?" I start. He turns to me. "This wasn't a flashback, was it?" He purses his lips together as he thinks. Then he speaks.

"No. It wasn't a flashback." He starts. "I've only seen this happen once a long time ago and I don't really remember how to handle it. All I remember is they need medical attention and fast, and I also remember is that we have to try to wake her up. Now come on, let's get her to her mother."

I scoop Katniss up into my arms and follow Haymitch out the back of the Justice Building. Us mentors have three hours of free time after the Reaping and then we board the train. I just hope Katniss wakes up before we have to leave.

When Haymitch and I reach Katniss's house in the Victor's Village, Haymitch doesn't even bother to knock and he just bursts through the door.

"We need help! It's Katniss!" He hollers as he bursts in. Prim and her mom come through the doorway of the kitchen and when they see me with Katniss in my arms, Prim rushes over.

"What's wrong with her?" She asks.

"She had a panic attack and passed out." Haymitch tells her. That was a panic attack?! Why did Katniss have to get stuck with all of this? Prim looks to me,

"Bring her over here." She states and walks into the living room. I follow her in and she stands by the couch,

"Just lay her down here." She says, motioning to the couch. I lay Katniss down on the couch and sit in the chair next to her as Prim and her mother inspect her for any bumps or bruises. When they're done doing that, Katniss's mom places one of her hands over Katniss's forehead and purses her lips for a moment before turning to Haymitch and I.

"She'll be fine," I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding. "But she has a mild fever, so she won't be able to do much while mentoring this year, she needs to rest during all the breaks you guys get and hopefully her fever breaks before she comes home in two weeks."

"Is that it?" Haymitch asks.

"That's it for now, as for waking her up, I don't know what to do about that." Her mom says.

"Usually, I wet cloth over the forehead wakes people in her state in a matter of minutes. Of course I've only done that to one other person who was a Victor, but she woke up in no time." Haymitch tells her. Mrs. Everdeen tells Prim to go wet a cloth and Prim walks into the kitchen and returns a few seconds later with a wet cloth. She places it gently over her sisters forehead and sits in a chair across from her, now all we have to do is wait.

We're all sitting in the living room in silence. It's been about ten minutes and Katniss still hasn't woken up. Prim has re-wetted the cloth three times in the past ten minutes, Mrs. Everdeen just watches Katniss closely, Haymitch is fiddling his fingers and I'm watching Katniss like Mrs. Everdeen. Prim get's up to re-wet the cloth again when Katniss bolts up and starts screaming. I rush to her side and grab her hands, I look her in the eyes and say,

"Katniss, it's ok. You're ok, we're just in your house in the Victor's Village. You're alright." She stops screaming and looks me in the eye before she starts crying and falls into my embrace.

"P-Peeta." She chokes between sobs. I rub small circles on her back while she cries,

"Shh, it's ok. You're ok." I say quietly. She eventually stops crying but she doesn't let go of me, she holds onto me tightly. I continue rubbing circles on her back. She pulls back and looks me in the eye before she looks at Haymitch,

"How ya doin' sweetheart?" He asks.

"Better." She says quietly.

"What did you see that made you freak out like that?" He asks.

"When Rory walked up onto the stage," She starts. "I saw all kinds of things. I saw him being killed in the arena, I saw him dying from dehydration and blood poisoning in the arena and I saw him being crowned Victor but then saw him waking from nightmares in the middle of the night. I tried to keep it together until we got back inside and once those doors we're closed, I let it all out and lost conciseness."

"Well, we're just glad you're okay now." Mrs. Everdeen starts. "Now, you guys better get going, you don't want Effie freaking out over where you've all disappeared to."

"You're right." Haymitch says standing up. "Let's go guys."

"By mom, by Prim." Katniss says.

"Bye Katniss." Prim says.

"Goodbye, dear." Mrs. Everdeen says. Then we walk out the door and head to the train station.

 **So, what do you guys think of the story so far? Let me know in the reviews! I hope you're all enjoying it! Anyways, chapter nine will be the Tribute Parade, Training Scores, the Interviews and all that and then chapter ten will be when the Games officially start! Stay tuned!**

 **~LetKatnissCatchFire**


	9. Chapter 9: One Hell of a Train Ride

**Chapter 9**

One Hell of a Train Ride

 **Katniss POV**

Us Victor's get three hours of free time after the Reaping while the Tributes get their three minutes goodbye's with their families and friends. Most of mine, Peeta's and Haymitch's free time didn't consist of much. Peeta and Haymitch played chess and I just sat on the couch in the sitting room and watched. They both looked so concentrated while playing, their faces of concentration were so identical it was scary. Peeta told me about my fever and how I have to rest at any given opportunity while mentoring this year. Not only do Peeta and I have to mentor someone out age and that was in our grade at school (before Peeta and I stopped going to school because of us being Victor's and all), but we also have to mentor Rory who is only thirteen just like Prim. Being on this dumb train doesn't help the situation. When we stepped onto the train it looked exactly like the one we rode to the Games last year and it probably is the same train, I immediately froze in place and almost had another flashback right then and there, there aren't many good memories associated with this train. Last time I was on this train I thought I was on my way to death. But, here I am, with Peeta who has been my husband for two weeks now. All of those times I said I never wanted to get married, I take it all back because being married to Peeta is the best thing ever. Is it weird that I'm actually considering having kids? I mean, it couldn't be so bad. If I can get over my fear of loving someone so much it hurts and getting married, who's to say I can't get over my fear of having kids? Even with the Games, who knows? Maybe President Snow will die before my kids turn twelve and the new President will get rid of the Hunger Games. I don't know what my future holds. Now that I'm sitting here thinking about it, I actually do really want children of my own. A mini Peeta running around the house would be adorable and I'm pretty sure Peeta thinks the same thing about a mini me running around. I know that Peeta wants kids too, I can see it in his eyes whenever we run into some of the little kids in the District while we're out. The way he looks at them and treats them with such kindness, he'd make an amazing father. Would I be a good mother? I did care for Prim all these years and now that our mother has come back to us, and that I don't need to hunt to provide for us or for us to survive anymore Prim is well taken care of. If I succeeded with Prim all those years, who's to say I can't take care children of my own? I was practically Prim's mother from the time she was seven to when she was Reaped and our mother finally came back. I don't hear any noise of Peeta or Haymitch so I snap out of my thought and swift back to reality only to find the two of them carefully eyeing me. I guess I've been staring into space and probably for a really long time.

"What?" I ask.

"What were you thinking about there, sweetheart? You looked pretty deep in thought." Haymitch says.

I open my mouth to speak but then close it again. Should I tell Peeta and Haymitch that I want kids of my own? Maybe now isn't the right time with the Quarter Quell and all that. I unfurrow my brow and look back at them, still looking at me.

"Um...uh...nothing. It was..nothing..really." I stutter. I have to come up with an excuse to get out of here before they start questioning me. Haymitch eyes me carefully, as does Peeta. They're probably wondering if I'll continue talking, I get a good look at the table, it's...it's... _mahogany._ I think back to when I stabbed that knife in between Haymitch's finger's last year and into the mahogany table. Then, I see blood, lot's and lot's of blood dripping everywhere. I gasp loudly causing Peeta and Haymitch to jump a little. I look frantically around the room, the blood not going away no matter where I look. I look back at what used to be Peeta and Haymitch, now they're covered in blood and it won't stop flowing. All I'm thinking is I need to get out of here before this flashback get's out of whack. I feel like hitting something, tearing something apart. Attacking something. I don't want it to be Peeta or Haymitch.

I gasp again. Peeta and Haymitch watch me carefully. "I need to go." I say quickly and I get up to run out o the room. I hear Peeta and Haymitch behind me.

"Katniss!" Peeta hollers for me to come back, but I'm afraid I'll hurt him and I don't want to do that. I find a supply closet, hurry inside and lock the door. Peeta and Haymitch start knocking on the door and tell me to let them in. I don't let them in obviously. This supply closet is the size of a bedroom I can destroy everything in this room if I wanted to. I quickly run over and grab the nearest supplies I can find and start throwing things around and breaking things. I snap a mop in half with the strength of my knee while I scream through the flashback.

"Please! Make it stop! Get out of my head!" I scream. "Make it stop! Make it stop! PLEASE!"

I continue destroying the supplies and when I don't feel like I want to break or attack anything else, I go and unlock the door of the supply closet, I'm about to go out but I suddenly feel very tired. I turn around and walk back around the room before I collapse onto a pile of broken wood and plastic adding more cuts than I already have as I slip into the darkness.

 **Peeta POV**

I have just beat Haymitch at chess and we're about to set up to play again but then I realize something. Katniss hasn't moved or said one word since she sat on the couch.

"Katniss has been awful quiet." I say to Haymitch. He turns to look at her as do I, she's just staring off into space but I can see in her eyes that she's thinking about something. About what? I don't know. As if she senses us eyeing her with her hunter senses, she blinks and looks down at Haymitch and I.

"What?" She asks.

"What were you thinking about there, sweetheart? You looked pretty deep in thought." Haymitch says. She opens her mouth to speak but then she closes it again. Her brow furrows as if debating if she should tell us or not.

"Um..uh..nothing. It was nothing..really." She stutters. Katniss hardly ever stutters. What is she hiding? Haymitch and I keep watching her, wondering if she'll continue talking. She looks down and I wonder what she's looking at. I'm about to ask her when she gasps causing Haymitch and I to jump and then starts looking around the room frantically. Her eyes have turned black and panic has filled them.

She gasps again, this time she speaks afterwards. "I need to go." She says quickly then she runs out of the room, Haymitch and I not far behind her.

"Katniss!" I call. She doesn't stop though. She runs into a supply closet and locks the door. I pound on the door and Haymitch and I plead her to open the door. Suddenly, we hear something breaking, shattering and crashing on the other side of the door. Suddenly, we hear something snap and Katniss screams causing me to worry. Did she hurt herself? What is she doing in there? Then she yells at the top of her lungs,

"Please! Make I stop! Get out of my head!" She screams. "Make it stop! Make it stop! PLEASE!"

Haymitch and I just looks at each other. Both panicking as the sounds of things breaking continue. After about ten minutes, everything falls silent and we hear the faint noise of the supply closet door being unlocked. I think Katniss is about to open the door but the door doesn't open. Katniss doesn't come out. Then, we hear the sound of something, no, someone collapse.

"We need to go inside." I tell Haymitch but before I can open the door, he stops me. I look at him with confusion.

"I'm warning you boy, this is the one thing that Katniss has done in a flashback that I HAVE seen before so I'm warning you right now, what you're about to see ain't pretty." He tells me.

"I think I can handle it." I say. With that, Haymitch opens the door, I don't know what I expected to find but it definitely wasn't this. Nearly everything is broken, cracked, or shattered. A cart to wheel the supplies around is broken in half, there's plastic and wood nearly everywhere around the room and the thing that catches my eye the most is an unconscious Katniss on top of a pile of wood and plastic, her hair a mess and covered in her own blood. All over her arms and hands and even some on her face. She has open scratches all over her arms, face and hands as well and they're all still bleeding. As Haymitch and I get closer to her I notice another thing. Her face is pale. A little _too_ pale for my liking which causes me to rush over to her side. Who knew all these little scratches could cause her to lose so much blood?

"These trains have medics right, Haymitch?" I ask.

"Yeah. Follow me to the medic compartment." He says. I scoop Katniss up and follow Haymitch to the medic compartment. When we walk in the Capitol medics come rushing towards Katniss, they lay her down on a stretcher and wheel her away to fix her up. Haymitch and I have to go back to the sitting room because Madge and Rory will be boarding the train in a few minutes.

When we enter the sitting room, we both sit down on the couch not saying a word. All I can think about right now is Katniss and how much I hate the Capitol for causing her to have to live with these damn flashbacks. I hate them for it. I hate the Capitol for everything they've done, from establishing The Hunger Games seventy-five years ago to forcing innocent _children_ to fight to the death to everything that Katniss, Haymitch, myself and all of the other Victor's have gone through and are going through. I try and focus on the Games this year even though I really don't want to. I wonder what Cinna and Portia have designed for this years costumes for the Tribute Parade, or what they've designed for their interview outfits. I continue wondering about how things will play out this year for the next five minutes until Effie, along with Madge and Rory board the train. This is probably one of the worst parts of mentoring... mentoring.

Rory immediately comes over to me and surprisingly hugs me. I don't hesitate to hug him back. I've always been fond of Rory. His younger brother, Vick, I'm not so sure of. Vick seems to glare at me all the time. Rory says it's because he thinks Gale and Katniss should've ended up together instead, that's his opinion though and every person has one.

"How you holding up there, Rory?" I ask him as he pulls away.

"I've been better if you know what I mean." He replies.

"I know exactly what you mean." I tell him. "Have you forgotten I was in your position last year?" I ask in a teasing tone causing him to smile. Exactly what I was going for. I turn to Madge.

"How are you doing, Madge?" I ask her.

"Still trying to get over the shock of being Reaped, and, as Rory said, I've been better." She replies.

"It takes a while so I wouldn't get your hopes up." I tell her sadly.

"Wheres Katniss?" Rory asks. "Isn't she supposed to be here, too?" Haymitch and I share a look.

"Uh... she had a little accident so she's in the medic compartment." Haymitch says.

"Oh my God, is she okay?" Madge and Rory say at the same time.

"She'll be fine." I reassure them. They both nod and we all fall silent. After a few minutes, Effie breaks it,

"Well, I should probably show Madge and Rory to their rooms." She stand up, "Come along children." Rory and Madge follow her out and Haymitch and I stay silent for a few more minutes.

"Out of the two of us, why did it have to be Katniss that got stuck with flashbacks?" I ask.

"Not every Victor has them kid, only two of them which is sweetheart in there and another girl Victor from District Four, they're very rare." Haymitch says. "So, it would be better if neither of you had them but Katniss got stuck with them. I can't control who it happens to."

"I bet you wish you could." A voice come from behind us. We turn around and see Katniss in the doorway.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" I ask her.

"Better then before that's for sure." She replies. She comes over and sits next to me and I wrap my arm around her. She leans her head on my shoulder and closes her eyes for a second before looking at me and smiling. Damn, these Capitol doctors are good because there is no evidence that Katniss was covered in cuts just twenty minutes ago. They also work very fast.

"Where are Rory and Madge?" She asks.

"Effie took them to show them their rooms." Haymitch says.

"Ok." She replies. "How are they handling it?"

"They seemed okay when we talked to them. They said they were still getting over the shock of being Reaped." I say.

"It's not easy to get over the shock, that's for sure." She says.

"No it isn't." I say. I pull her closer to me and she closes her eyes. After a few minutes she's asleep and Haymitch and I just sit in silence. I rub small circles on Katniss's shoulder while she sleeps. She looks so innocent while she's sleeping. Like she didn't have to go through the horror of the Hunger Games. It's calming in a way because it makes me forget that she has to deal with the horrible flashbacks. Effie comes back into the sitting room and says Rory and Madge will be in their rooms until dinner. Tomorrow we arrive in the Capitol, based on the way Katniss's flashback ended up like today, I can't imagine what they'll be like if she has one in the Capitol. There's one thing I'm sure of though and that is that this was one hell of a train ride.

 **A/N: I know I said that this would be the Tribute Parade and stuff but if I added all of that to what I had written already, this chapter would've been way longer than it need to be. So, the next chapter will be the Tribute Parade, Training Scores and the Interviews. PROMISE!**

 **~LetKatnissCatchFire**


	10. Chapter 10: The Tribute Parade

**Chapter 10**

The Tribute Parade

 **Katniss POV**

I don't want to go to sleep tonight because I'm not ready to face the nightmares that will plague me if I do. With my panic attack AND flashback today I really am exhausted but I can't face the nightmares. Right now I'm getting ready for bed with Peeta but he will be the only one sleeping tonight because I plan to stay up all night. If I don't, well, I'll cross that bridge when I get there. I finish brushing my teeth and walk out of the bathroom. Peeta is already under the covers waiting for me like every night. I crawl in next to him, he wraps his arm around me and I rest my head on his chest where his heart is like I do every night. Our room is completely silent for a few minutes and I think Peeta has fallen asleep when I hear his soft voice,

"Are you doing okay?" He asks.

"Not completely but I'll manage." I reply softly.

"I can't imagine what goes through your head when that happens." He says.

"I think that's a good thing because I would hate it if you had them, too." I tell him.

"It sucks that you got stuck with them though." He says.

"I know." I start. "No one should have to get stuck with them, but I'm one of the unlucky Victors. One of the two that is."

"I wonder who the other Victor is that has them, Haymitch never names her, he just calls her 'her' or 'she'. Why do you think he won't name her?" He asks me.

"He probably wants to introduce her to us when we get to the Capitol." I say.

"That makes sense." He says.

We're silent for a few minutes when Peeta speaks again,

"We should get some sleep, we'll be in the Capitol tomorrow and I don't think we'll get much of it."

"Yeah." I start. "Goodnight, Peeta."

"Goodnight, Katniss."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

I don't sleep at all tonight, I lay awake staring at the ceiling thinking about nothing in particular.

I look at the clock, it's 6:57, Effie will be coming to wake us any moment now. I just take advantage of the last few minutes of silence I have.

As predicted, at 7:00 sharp Effie bangs on the door,

"Up, up, up, up!" She squeals. "Today is a big, big, big, big day!" I don't think I will ever get used to her Capitol accent. I grunt and get out of bed and walk into the bathroom to start getting ready for the day. I take a quick shower and brush my teeth. I walk out and Peeta goes into the bathroom to get ready.

I go to the closet and put on the first outfit that I see, black jeans and a purple blouse. By the time I'm finished getting dressed Peeta has already come out of the bathroom and is getting dressed. Again, we have to wear similar clothing so he is also in black jeans and a purple shirt.

"Sleep well?" I ask him.

"Yeah, how about yourself?" He replies. _Shit, I was hoping he wouldn't ask me back._

"I slept fine." I lie. _I really hope he doesn't see through me._

"Katniss, I know you didn't sleep at all last night." He says. _Dammit!_

"How so?" I question.

"The bags under your eyes say it all." He states. _I didn't even see the bags under my eyes this morning, I guess I wasn't paying attention to myself._

"I wasn't that tired last night." I lie again.

"Katniss Mellark, you are a very terrible liar." He says. I'm never going to get tired of hearing those two names together.

"Ok fine," I huff. "I just.. I.. I didn't want to face the nightmares."

"You always have nightmares though." Peeta states the obvious.

"Yes, but I had a panic attack AND a flashback yesterday, the images were going to haunt my nightmares if I slept last night and that would only make the nightmares worse." I tell him.

He doesn't respond, he just opens his arms and I walk into his embrace. I wrap my arms around him tightly and he does the same to me.

"It's okay, Katniss." He says into my hair. "We'll get through this."

"We always do." I say into his shirt.

He pulls back and looks into my eyes before replying,

"Always." The he pulls me back into his arms and we stand like that for a few minutes. When we pull apart, he asks,

"Are you okay, now?"

"Yeah." I start. "For now." He knows what I mean. We arrived in the Capitol around 4:00 this morning and Haymitch, Peeta and I have no idea how I'll react when we step off the train and we're going to be here for two weeks. Let's just say, no matter what happens today, these two weeks are going to be rough as hell.

I brush my hair and leave it down in it's waves and Peeta combs his hair to the right side of his head where it's supposed to be. Just as Peeta puts his comb down Effie bangs on the door,

"Come on you two! Five minutes until showtime!" She squeals then she walks away and her heals click annoyingly as she does.

"Let's go see Rory and Madge." Peeta says.

"Yeah, let's go." I reply. With that we walk out the door and head to the sitting room to find Rory and Madge sitting on the couch. We sit in the chairs across from them and they look at us as we do.

"What happens when we get off the train?" Madge asks.

"You guys will be put in the hands of your stylists, Peeta and I had them last year so don't worry they're not annoying like the rest of the citizens here." I say.

"You're not going to like what they do to you at first, but just go along with it." Peeta tells them.

"Why? What do they do to us?" Rory asks.

"You'll have to wait and find out for yourself." I say and I smirk at him. Then Effie bursts into the room,

"Alright, thirty seconds until show time! Let's go people!" She says. We all stand up and make our way to the door of the train.

"Five... four... three... two... one." Effie says quietly and she opens the door of the train. Instantly, there's camera's flashing everywhere, Madge and Rory are shading their eyes for they're not used to the flashing just yet. Peeta and I handle the flashed just fine hence we've dealt with the flashes MANY times.

I'm about to think I'm not going to have a flashback when I see it. In the distance I can see the top of the Training Center where we'll be staying for two weeks.

I gasp and freeze in my tracks. My eyes wide, all of the memories coming back to me. The images become more haunting than before. I start hyperventilating. Haymitch, Peeta, Rory and Madge all look at me, Rory and Madge look confused and Peeta and Haymitch have concern and fear in their eyes. Suddenly they disappear and I'm back in the Training Center getting ready to be sent to my death, but one thing is clear before it fades away...

Madge and Rory are about to witness one of my flashbacks.

 **Peeta POV**

It's obvious that Rory and Madge aren't used to flashing cameras so they're shading their eyes. Katniss and I on the other hand are way used to this so we don't have to shade ours. Same with Haymitch obviously. Things seem to be going well, Katniss seems fine for right now. I know I shouldn't get my hopes up though.

Suddenly I hear someone start to hyperventilate. I automatically know who that someone is, _Katniss._ I face her and she's frozen in place, eyes wide and hyperventilating. She's about to have a flashback, but not in front of the Capitolites, they'll get suspicious. Rory and Madge look at her in confusion for they don't know about Katniss's flashbacks. I'm by her side in an instant, I wrap my arm around her and force her to walk to the car. She's muttering something but I can hardly hear her because of all the stupid noise coming from the camera's and people screaming questions at us.

"Rory, Madge, come on. We have to get to the car." I say. The nod and follow me to the car. Effie and Haymitch sit up towards the front and Rory, Madge, Katniss and I sit near the back. Once the doors close, Haymitch turns to me.

"How's she coping?" He asks.

"At least she's not screaming like she usually does. That has to be a good sign." I tell him. He nods,

"Just keep trying to bring her out of it." He says. With that he turns back to the way he was facing. Katniss's muttering get's louder and I can finally hear what she's saying.

"Real or Not Real? Real or Not Real? Real or Not Real?" She mutters. I know that the car is about to take off but I need Haymitch back here.

"Haymitch, I'm gonna need your help with this." I call to him.

"Alright, kid." He says. He get's out of the front and comes to the back where Katniss and I are sitting.

"What's she doing now?" He asks me.

"Just listen to her." I tell him.

"What's wrong with Katniss?" Rory asks.

"We'll explain later, okay Rory?" I tell him. He nods and goes back to watching us.

"Real or Not Real? Real or Not Real? Real or Not Real?" Katniss keeps muttering.

"She can't tell what images are real and which ones aren't real, obviously." Haymitch starts. "We just have to help her." I nod and look at Katniss.

"Katniss, you have to ask us what's real and what's not so we can help you, okay?" I ask her gently. She nods stiffly. At least she understood me, that's an improvement.

She begins talking instead of muttering,

"We're in the Capitol, Real or Not Real?" She asks.

"Real." Haymitch says. I look into Katniss's eyes, they're rapidly switching from gray to black to gray to black. Have her eyes always done this in flashbacks?

"We're here for the Hunger Games, Real or Not Real?"

"Real." I say.

"We're tributes this year, Real or Not Real?"

"Not real." I say.

"We have to kill people this year, Real or Not Real?"

"Not real." Haymitch says. Katniss's eyes are slowly coming back to being just gray again.

"We won the Games last year, Real or Not Real?"

"Real." I say.

"We're mentors this year, Real or Not Real?"

"Real." Haymitch says.

"We're mentoring Rory and Madge this year, Real or Not Real?"

"Real." I say sadly. Her eyes are back to their regular color. She's back. Katniss is back. She blinks a few times before speaking,

"What happened?" She asks.

"We just came up with a game for you, that's what happened." Haymitch replies.

"Game?" She questions.

"You were having trouble remembering what was real and what wasn't so you asked us 'Real or Not Real'." I tell her.

"Here's how this can help you," Haymitch starts. "Whenever you feel a flashback coming on, just blurt out the image that pops into your head and ask if it's real or not. Simple."

"That'll help I'm sure." She says.

"It sure will." I say. "It helped you tremendously just now." We're almost to the Training Center but it isn't that far from the station so this has to be Katniss's shortest flashback ever.

"Are you okay, Katniss?" Rory asks.

"I'm fine, thanks Rory." She says. "We'll explain what just happened to you two later." They both nod. Madge has been awfully quiet which I guess is normal for her, she was never the most social person in school. A few minutes later we pull up to the Training Center and as soon as we get out, Rory and Madge are swept away into the hands of Cinna and Portia. Time to get ready for the Tribute Parade.

 **Katniss POV**

After a few hours, we are called to head down to the Tribute Parade. Peeta and I get the luxury of sitting in the mentor section of the stadium with Haymitch and the other past Victors. Peeta and I put on the outfits that were laid out for us and head down. Haymitch meets us at the car and we drive off to the Parade Stadium.

So now I have a new game to play whenever I feel a flashback coming on called Real or Not Real. Basically all I do is say the image that pops in my head, ask if it's Real or Not Real, and then Peeta or Haymitch will tell me if it is. We'll "play" the game until I'm out of the flashback and back to reality. Simple right? Not really. Fighting flashbacks is harder than it sounds, you have to try and grasp reality like a lifeline and never let go. It's the grasping reality thing that's difficult because when I'm in a flashback there's hardly any reality at all with the images in my mind. Everything fogs up and nothing is clear. I can never tell what's real or not. Which is why Haymitch came up with the game, to help bring me back to reality.

We pull up to the Stadium and when we get out I see that nothing has changed. It's all the same as last year, everything is exactly the same. Everything. _Shit._

"We're at the Tribute Parade... Real or Not Real." I feel Peeta's gaze as he turns to look at me. Haymitch too.

"Real." One of them says. I'm not sure which.

"We're in the Parade this year, Real or Not Real?"

"Not Real."

"We're heading to our death soon, Real or Not Real?"

"Not Real."

"We-we-we're mentoring..." I can feel them staring at me, waiting for me to continue I guess.

"Real." I hear myself say.

"We're mentors this year. Real."

"We're in the Parade this year. Not Real."

"We're heading to our death soon. Not Real."

"We're all safe...Real."

I finish my statements and my vision is clear, I can see Peeta and Haymitch. Their eyes wide with shock.

"Are we gonna go find Madge and Rory or not?" I ask. With that I walk past them to find our Tributes.

 **Peeta POV**

Is this really happening? Is Katniss really bringing herself out of her flashback? She's really playing the game on her own.

"We're all safe...Real." She says softly. Then she looks at Haymitch and I. Her eyes back to their original color. Haymitch and mine's eyes are wide with shock I'm sure.

"Are we gonna go find Madge and Rory or not?" She asks. Then she walks past us to go find them.

I look at Haymitch and he looks at me.

"Did she just...?" I stutter.

"Bring herself out? Hell yeah she did." He responds.

"Wha-How?" I question.

"I don't know kid, but I don't think that'll happen often so don't get your hopes up." He says. Then he follows Katniss.

"I wasn't planning on it." I tell him then I follow him.

We find Madge and Rory and talk with them for a while. They're nervous, no, let me rephrase that, they're terrified for this parade. They're not used to thousands of people's eyes on them but I guess that's about to change. Haymitch leads us to the mentors section and we take our seats. The Parade is about to begin. The music starts and the chariots come out. Districts 1 and 2 have tried to copy the fire affect that Katniss and I had last year but really it's just sloppy and doesn't look real. Katniss and I can hear Cinna and Portia laughing from the stylist section. Clearly they see it too. Other than that all of the other Districts are in costumes that represent their District.

Then Madge and Rory come out.

Their costumes are breathtaking.

They've gone with the fire again but their costumes are coal black and there are fire spots all over and the flames trailing behind them. It mixes well with their coal black makeup. One everyone sees their costumes they cheer louder and louder.

"Looks like District 12 is the big hit once again!" Caesar's voice booms around the stadium. That just makes the crowd cheer... EVEN. LOUDER. Louder than I thought possible. Almost as loud as they cheered for Katniss and I last year. Seriously though, do these Capitol people ever shut up? I think I can answer my own question though, no, they don't.

I look at Katniss to make sure she's alright, President Snow is about to give his speech and I don't think that's the best time to be set off. She's just staring at nothing in particular, eyes wandering wherever. I wonder what's going through that pretty little head of hers. I continue to watch her, sometimes she smiles at the thoughts in her head and then goes back to thinking and a few seconds laster she'll be smiling again. What is she thinking about? I might ask her about it later.

Snow ends his speech and the Tributes are taken back into the stadium. We get up from our seats and head to go meet them. When we find them we walk up to them.

"Was that as scary as you thought?" Katniss asks them.

"I guess not." Madge says.

"It was really weird though having all of those people's eyes watching me." Rory says.

"You'll get used to it." I say. He will. He's going into the Hunger Games for Gods sake and the entire country is going to be watching him and the other Tributes.

We all hop in the car and ride back to the Training Center. When we get there I keep an eye on Katniss to make sure something doesn't set her off. She seems fine so I don't watch her as much.

Later at dinner, Madge and Rory come "late".

"Where have you two been?" Effie huffs as they walk into the dining room.

"Sorry, we fell asleep in our rooms." Rory apologizes.

"The beds here are more comfortable than the ones at home that's for sure." Madge adds.

"Way more comfortable than at home." Rory agrees. Then they sit down and begin eating.

"You've been awfully quiet lately, sweetheart, are you feeling okay?" Haymitch asks Katniss. I look over at her, she looks fine but she has been quiet lately.

"I feel fine, I just..." She trails off, her face turns green a little. "Never mind." She says and she sprints from the room. I follow her to the bathroom in the hall and hold her hair back as everything she's eaten today comes back up into the toilet. When she's finished she flushes the toilet and leans back against the wall. I place my hand across her forehead to check her temperature.

"Your fevers gone up." I tell her.

"I can feel it. It feels like my head is burning." She says lazily. I help her up and she washed her mouth out and we go back out to the dining room where everyone is waiting.

"I'm okay now." Katniss tells them. "I've just lost my appetite now since I just threw up."

We sit back down and the rest of us finish eating while Katniss sits there quietly. We make small conversation but mostly the only noise at the table is the silverware hitting the dishes. Every once in a while, Katniss will pick up her fork and I always think she's going to eat something but she just ends up pushing the food around on her plate.

After dinner, Effie says,

"It's time to watch the Parade Recap!" Then she rushes to the living room and sits in the chair closest to the TV. Madge and Rory sit next to each other on the couch as do Katniss and I. Soon the Recap starts and the Tributes from District 1 come out and so on. Then Madge and Rory come out and you can clearly hear the volume raise tremendously in the crowd's cheers. Madge and Rory have disgusted looks on their faces.

"How can they cheer for us when we're being sent to our death?" Rory asks. Clearly aggravated.

"Because they don't know what it's like to be in the Games. That and they're crazy." Haymitch grumbles. "They don't know what the Games do to people. Cinna and Portia here have never been in an arena but they understand that what happens around here isn't right."

"Yeah, we do." Cinna speaks up. "Portia and I may not have ever been Tributes, but after watching the Games for years we can only imagine what that kind of stuff does to your mind."

"It's awful." Katniss says softly. We all turn our heads to her to listen. "The arena's awful. What you have to see. What you have to witness..." She stands up slowly. "What you have to do in order to get out alive!" She's shouting now.

"All these years, the God damn Capitol have been sending innocent children to their deaths and it's not fucking fair!" She tries to calm down but I don't think it's working. Is she on the edge of a flashback right now? God, I hope not.

"How bad does it usually get in there?" Madge asks.

"Worse than you can imagine." Haymitch says. "I wouldn't put anyone through it if I had a say in what the Capitol does. The Hunger Games break people in more ways than doctors know."

"It costs everything that you are to kill people. Innocent people!" Katniss shouts. "It costs more tha your life itself! Even after you're out of the arena, you never leave!"

She takes a breath.

"The nightmares you face at night. I've been terrified of sleep ever since I came out of that bloody arena because of the damn nightmares!" She softens for a split second, "The only way the nightmares are kept bay is when Peeta's there. He helps the most." Then she's back to yelling.

"I had to murder innocent people who had their whole lives ahead of them! Their blood will be on my hands forever! Even after I'm dead!"

I literally have no idea why we're all just sitting here and watching her explode.

As if reading my thoughts, Haymitch stands up.

"Hey, calm down sweetheart. We all know that talking about the arena is hard, but we can't yell about it here." He tells her. Then he sits back down.

We all watch to see how she'll react. Haymitch and I mostly.

Katniss just stands there and after a few minutes, Effie sends Rory and Madge to bed and then Effie retires for the night herself. Cinna and Portia leave and head back to the Stylists Center where they stay during the Games.

It's only until after Haymitch finally turns the TV off that I can hear someone murmuring. I quickly realize it's Katniss. What she's saying, I don't know. She sinks down to the ground, pulls her knees to her chest, covers her ears and squeezes her eyes shut. Still muttering whatever she's muttering.

Until her muttering turns into talking,

and her talking turns into more yelling.

"Don't go mutt! Don't go mutt! Don't go mutt! Don't go mutt, Katniss! Don't go mutt!" She shrieks.

"DON'T! GO! MUTT!" She screams. Her body is shaking like crazy and her breathing is rapid.

"DON'T GO MUTT, KATNISS! DON'T GO MUTT!" She continues to yell. I don't even know what to do. She's never done this before.

"DON'T! GO! MU-" She cuts herself off. Then she growls. _Growls._ What is going through her head right now?

"Not Real, Katniss. Not Real." Haymitch tells her, slowly standing up. Katniss's growls only get louder. He goes to put a hand on her shoulder but she _snarls_ , leaps to her feet and jumps back a few steps.

I finally get up and walk over to her, she sees me and recognition flashes through her eyes before they're back to being black. She isn't attacking me so I take that as a good sign. I place my hands on her shoulders, she flinches and tries to get away but I hold her where she is. Then she tries coming at me, but my hands hold her in place. She gives up and looks me in the eye, I take the opportunity to talk.

"Not Real, Katniss. What you're seeing isn't real." I say softly. "Please, come back."

Her breathing slows down and her eyes are back to gray. She locks eyes with me again,

"Peeta?" She whispers.

"Are you okay?" I ask. She hesitates and looks down. When she looks back up at me she says,

"I remember." She whispers.

"You remember what?" I ask. Even I already know the answer.

"I remember what I did to you both in that flashback! Or at least tried to!" She screams, backing away.

"I'm a mutt." She whispers so low I almost don't hear it. My eyes automatically lock with hers,

"No. You're not a mutt. Don't even say that about yourself."

"But I am!" She argues. "If you hadn't held me back God know what I probably would've done to you!"

"Katni-" I try to speak but she cuts me off.

"I'm a monster! That's the first time I've ever tried attacking you and I know it won't be the last." Her voice softens and she emphasizes the _know_ in the sentence.

"No, you're not." I argue.

"I am." She says quietly. "I need time to clear my head. I'll be back before bed time." With that she walks off. I already know she's heading to the roof. It's the only place where there's actually _some_ peace in the Capitol.

I know that Rory and Madge asking questions about the arena probably set her off, but which question was it? Or was it the Parade Recap? I doubt it but you never know.

Later on while I'm slipping my pajama shirt over my head, Katniss walks into the room and puts her pajamas on. We climb underneath the covers silently and I pull her to my chest and rub small circles on her shoulder.

"Are you okay, now?" I ask quietly.

"Yeah. I just had to clear my mind." She responds.

"Everybody does sometimes." I say.

"I love you." She says.

"I love you, too." I reply. Then we fall silent and eventually fall asleep.

 **A/N: I'm so sorry I haven't updated in forever, I know! I wanted to update over my Thanksgiving Break last week but I ended up starting TWO new stories instead. If you haven't read them yet, you should go check them out! The Training Scores and Interviews are** _ **FOR SURE**_ **going to be in the next chapter and then the Games start in chapter 12. Stay tuned! How do you like the story so far? Leave a review and let me know!**

 **~LetKatnissCatchFire**


	11. Chapter 11: The Training Scores

**Chapter 11**

The Training Scores

 **Katniss POV**

Madge and Rory have their Individual Assessments today, and I can tell they're not too excited about it. Peeta and I weren't either. The Individual Assessments really is only fun for the Career Tributes. Madge and Rory have been nervous wrecks since they woke up this morning. I don't blame them. Since Peeta and I don't have to do any of that this year, I've been doing what Mentors usually do during this time since Peeta and I have to do this every year now. Unless President Snow decides to stop the Games suddenly but I HIGHLY doubt it. That man is crazy from head to toe. I don't know what goes through his mind and frankly, I don't EVER want to find out.

I think Mentors are supposed to try to get sponsors but since the Tributes haven't had their individual assessments yet, we haven't seen their training scores so we probably wouldn't know what to say to the sponsors to get them to sponsor out Tributes. Although, since Peeta and I were the stars last year, the sponsors may think Madge and Rory are just as great as we were. They may be right, Madge and Rory are good at a lot of things, I've see them to many good things that would be useful in the arena, but I don't know if the Gamemaker's will think that what they can do is impressive enough. I don't know what goes thorough their drunken heads and just like President Snow, I don't EVER want to find out.

We asked Madge and Rory about their special skills the other day and Rory said he could hunt decently. Which he can. Gale and I started teaching him how to use a bow and make snares when he turned ten. He's gotten pretty good in the past three years.

Madge said she was good at painting, running, and hiding. Which I know that all of these things are true. Madge was always the fastest at running in PE when Peeta and I went to school before our Games last year. Madge is pretty quiet on her feet too so I can see how she's good at hiding. In fact, when we were in Elementary school, Madge was the Hide and Seek champion until we couldn't compete in the Hide and Seek competition in fourth grade. She's incredible.

I can only hope the Gamemaker's think so, too.

 **Peeta POV**

When Madge and Rory get back from their Individual Assessments, this is how it goes.

"It wasSUPER BORING." Madge says.

"Boring? I must hear this." Haymitch says.

"Nobody did much of anything while waiting." Rory tells us.

"What did the other Tributes do?" Katniss asks.

"Not much really." Madge answers. "Even the CAREERS hardly did any training. They were too busy being idiots."

"How so?" I ask.

"They literally took spears, stared at them, and then threw them on the ground and stared at them some more."

"They don't seem very lethal this year." Rory adds. "There's even this one kid who's fourteen, and apparently he's Cato's cousin. He did nothing at all. He just sat back and watched everyone else."

Katniss freezes at the mention of Cato. I rub circles on her back because that usually calms her if she's slipping from reality.

"It's okay, Katniss." I whisper to her. "He's dead remember?" She nods and goes back to listening to Madge and Rory.

"Rory and I were practically the only Tributes doing anything productive the entire time!" Madge exclaims.

"We steered clear of our strengths though like Haymitch told us." Rory adds.

"Good. You don't want them knowing." Katniss says.

"Well, you guys have three more days of Training and then you have your interviews before the Games. Make the next three days count." Haymitch tells them. They nod and head to their rooms to change into normal clothing.

"Um, I'm gonna go.. lay down. My head hurts." Katniss says, stuttering a little bit. "I'll try to be awake before dinner." With that she leaves the room and heads to ours.

"I wonder what that was all about." Haymitch says.

"She just had a pre-flashback when Rory brought up Cato, maybe her mind is still coming back to reality a little bit." I say.

"That, or her fever could've gone up again." He says. "The Cato thing makes sense though."

"I'll check her temperature in a bit while she's sleeping." I tell him. He nods and we go into the sitting room to find Effie fixing her makeup.

"Where's Katniss?" Effie asks, without even looking up from her mirror.

"She has a bad headache so she's laying down in our room." I tell her.

"Oh, the poor dear. It's truly upsetting that she got sick." She says.

"Yeah. Her mother says her fever should break before the Games are over." I tell her.

"That would be lovely. I hate seeing her sick." She says sympathetically.

"I hate seeing her in pain or anything related to it." I say. Trying to lighten the mood.

"Don't we all?" She asks. Even though I know it's a rhetorical question.

Madge and Rory come back into the room in normal everyday clothes and we all just sit in silence. It's a very awkward silence hence nobody knows what to say. Nobody says a word. I usually hate silence for a certain period of time but I really don't know what ti talk about just like everyone else so I'm definitely NOT going to be the one to start the conversation this time.

But the silence is weird. Really weird. You'd think Haymitch would crack a joke somewhere here ad there but he doesn't. We all stay silent for a very long time.

 **Katniss POV**

When I enter the bedroom I flop down on the bed with a huff. How am I going to tell Peeta? How am I going to tell Haymitch? I can predict Peeta's reaction but not Haymitch's hence he doesn't show his emotions often. How am I going to tell them? The only other people who know are Cinna and Portia, maybe they can help me figure out how to tell everyone else. This is going to be extremely difficult. I never thought I'd be saying these words since my father died. Then again, I never thought I'd get married either so I guess I should've expected this. I'm actually excited about this. I mean yeah, when I found out at first I was terrified but then I got excited. I actually found out today while Haymitch and Peeta were talking about something and I was with Cinna and Portia. My fever broke a few hours ago so I feel perfectly fine for right now. I only gave the excuse of having a headache so I could plan how I'm going to tell everyone.

It's frustrating how I can't come up with anything. I've been thinking for hours and I've got nothing.

That's it, I need to speak with Cinna and Portia. NOW.

 **Peeta POV**

Effie eventually turned on the TV and we all just sat on the couch and started watching this one show that Effie really enjoys. It's not the best show in the world because it's the worst show in the world. I'm not even going to go into details. Cinna and Portia come in at some point when the two characters are in the middle of another fight. Don't. Ask.

"Where's Katniss?" Portia asks as they sit down.

"She's in our room laying down." I tell them. "She has a headache."

Cinna and Portia give each other a knowing look then turn back to me. What was that look about because I didn't fail to notice it.

"That's odd." Cinna says. "Her fever broke hours ago." I didn't know that but I guess now I know it was the Cato's cousin thing.

"It must've been the pre-flashback then." I tell them. They nod and look at each other again, the knowing look in their eyes again. What the hell is going on? I wish I knew what they were thinking about.

As if she sensed she was being talked about, Katniss comes into the sitting room and stands in the doorway.

"Cinna, Portia." She says. They turn to her. "Can I... Can I talk to you two for a minute?" They nod and stand up.

"We'll be right back." Portia says. With that they walk out with Katniss. Does the knowing look they had in their eyes have something to do with Katniss? And if so, what is it?

"She seemed a bit off." Haymitch says.

"Yeah, a little bit." I agree. "Did you see the look on Cinna and Portia's faces when we started talking about Katniss?"

"Oh, I saw it alright. I didn't know what it was about but I definitely saw it." He says.

"There was just this knowing look in their eyes when we started talking about her." I tell him.

"Yeah, I saw that, too." He says. "I don't know what sweetheart and them two are talking about right now, but I sure would like to know."

"So would I, Haymitch." I say. "So would I."

 **Katniss POV**

Cinna, Portia, and I have it all planned out. We're going to tell everyone after dinner tonight when the Training Scores are announced. Now all we have to do is wait for dinner time and it's not for at least another two or three hours so we head back to the sitting room.

Cinna and Portia go back to where they were sitting and I sit next to Peeta. He wraps his arm around me and I lay my head on his shoulder.

"Hey." He says.

"Hey." I reply.

"Are you feeling, okay?" He asks.

"I'm feeling better than I was when we left a few days ago that's for sure." I tell him.

"Good." He says and he kisses my head. Than he turns back to the TV where this completely ridiculous Capitol TV show is playing. Apparently, it's Effie's favorite show and she watches it all the time. I, personally, hate the show. It's so... DUMB. "You stole my lipstick!" "I did not!" "You did, too!" "I did not!" and so on. It's so dumb and boring and unnecessary. At least in my opinion, but to Effie and all the other crazy Capitolites, they think it's dramatic. If I cared about any of that stuff, maybe I would, too. On second thought, WHY would I care about that stuff? It's not that important. It's just makeup. T me, makeup is just something you use to paint your face. Your face is the canvas, the makeup is the paint and you're the artist. That's just how I see it.

Madge and Rory won't even tell us what they did for their Individual Assessments and they said that they won't tell us until after their scores are shown tonight. I have assumptions of what they did hence I know them both extremely well.

I'm guessing Rory showed them his skills with a bow and basic snares. He's pretty much like me so I can only imagine his session was similar to mine except the 'shooting an arrow at the Gamemaker's' part. I hope.

I'm guessing Madge showed them how silent she is and how incredible she is at hiding and maybe even showing them her camouflage skills. She probably mostly did the camouflage part though. She's almost as good as Peeta. _Almost._ I've seen her in art class, same with Peeta, the art they both make is a force to be reckoned with.

 _ **Later that evening...**_

I've hardly touched my dinner. I'm just not hungry. I've lost my appetite. I haven't been hungry since we got here but for Peeta's benefit, I try and eat something. After Cinna, Portia and I make the big announcement later I can explain to Peet why I'm hardly eating. When everybody's finished with dinner, the Avox's take the dirty plates away and replace them with the desert plates. Tonight's desert is chocolate covered strawberries. They're good, but with me hardly having an appetite I don't eat all of them. I notice that Peeta's been eyeing me every once in a while during dinner and desert. Concern written all over his face. Oh, how I can't wait to see his reaction.

After desert, we all gather around the TV waiting for the Training Scores to air. After a few minutes, Caesar finally fills the screen.

"Good evening, People of Panem! Tonight, we will reveal the Tribute Training Scores!"

He starts with District 1 of course and makes his way up to District 12. So far all of the scores are good. Cato's cousin – who's name I now know is Cameron – scores a 10 like Cato did last year. History does repeat itself, am I right? Whatever. Anyway, then Caesar starts with District 12.

"Rory Hawthorne..." He starts. "With a score of... 10." Everyone cheers.

"What did you do, Rory?" Haymitch asks.

"I showed my strengths." Is all he says, but I know that my assumptions were correct.

"And finally, Madge Undersee..." Caesar says. "With a score of... 10. Well the Tributes did fantastic this year! Happy Hunger Games and may the odds be ever in your favor!" With that the broadcast ends. Everyone cheers again.

"What'd you do, Madge?" Peeta asks.

"I showed my strengths." Is all she says. She said the same thing as Rory so I can only guess that my assumptions were right once again. I know these two really well, I guess.

"Since we're celebrating..." Cinna says, standing up. _It's time._

Portia stands up next to him. "Katniss has an exciting announcement." They look at each other and smile then smile at me.

I look at Peeta, he's looking at me quizzically. I just smile at him and go stand next to Cinna and Portia.

I look around at everyone in the room, but just before I say my announcement, my eyes lock with Peeta's and I say the words,

"I'm pregnant."

 **A/N: BAM! Baby bomb in your faces! I just thought it'd be cool writing about Katniss being pregnant, I've actually thought about it for a while and I just decided to throw it into this chapter. The next chapter is the reactions and the interviews, I PROMISE! I keep changing my plans for the chapters at the last minutes and it's honestly frustrating. How do you like the story so far? Leave a review and let me know! Hope you all have a great day!**

 **~LetKatnissCatchFire**


	12. Chapter 12: The Interviews

**Chapter 12**

The Interviews

 **Peeta POV**

"Katniss has a very exciting announcement." Portia says. Standing up next to Cinna. I look at Katniss quizzically, she just smiles at me, gets up and walks over next to Cinna and Portia. She looks around at everyone in the room, then her eyes lock with mine and she says,

"I'm pregnant."

We're all quiet for a moment and then Haymitch and Effie burst into loud cheers, same with Madge and Rory. They all congratulate her and then reality hits me.

 _I'm going to be a father._

I lock eyes with Katniss again and my face breaks out into probably the biggest smile I've had on my face since our wedding. I spring from my place on the couch and run to her and crush her into my embrace. She wraps her arms around my neck and buries her face in my shoulder. When we pull apart, I look her in the eyes again.

"Is this real?" I breathe.

"Yes, Peeta. It's real." She whispers. "We're going to have a baby." We smile at each other and I pull her back into my embrace. Everyone around us is cheering and clapping. We finally pull apart after about ten minutes.

"Congratulations, Katniss!" Madge squeals. Then she hugs Katniss so tightly, I'm sure she couldn't breathe for a minute. Then it's Rory.

"Never though I'd see the day." He teases.

"Oh, shut up, Rory." Katniss giggles and then hugs him. He pulls back and smiles at her and then goes back to sit down.

"Congratulations, sweetheart." Haymitch tells her.

"Thanks, Haymitch." She says. Then he turns to me.

"You did a good job, kid." He tells me.

"Thanks, Haymitch." I say. Then Effie comes up and squeezes Katniss in a tight embrace.

"Oh, Katniss! This is so exciting!" She squeals.

"I know, Effie. I know." Katniss says as Effie let's go of her. "I'm excited, too. I think you all know Peeta is as well with the way he reacted."

I laugh. "Is that a bad thing?" I tease.

"Absolutely not." Katniss tells me.

"Good." I laugh. Cinna and Portia hug her and say congratulations and then they head back to the Stylist's Center for the night.

Effie sends us all to bed, and when Katniss climbs into bed, I pull her to my chest and place one of my hands on her stomach. It's still flat, but I know that there's a little life growing in there.

"When did you find out?" I ask her.

"Today, a few hours after my fever broke." She says. "I threw up again and Cinna asked if it was possible that I might be pregnant, I said maybe so he got a test and I took it and it came out positive."

"Do you know how far along you are?" I ask.

"The test had a +1 after the positive sign so I'm a month along." She tells me. "That's why my appetite hasn't been too great."

"At least now I don't have to worry." I tease.

"Yup." She says. "Goodnight, Peeta."

"Goodnight, Katniss." I say. Then I start smoothly rubbing her stomach.

"Goodnight, baby." I whisper.

 **The Next Day**

 **Katniss POV**

Well, I was right about Peeta's reaction. He was ecstatic when I announced it. I know he's always wanted to be a father, and now I'm not really afraid to have kids anymore so I stopped taking my birth control. I'm actually almost as excited as Peeta is about this. I say almost because NOBODY can be as excited as Peeta is about it.

Madge and Rory have their Interviews tonight and then the Games tomorrow and they're scared as hell. They seem fine about the Interviews, it's the Games that's got them all jittery. Peeta, Haymitch and I can relate hence we've experience the horrors of the Games. The Interviews actually aren't that bad. In fact, the Capitol has arranged an Interview for Peeta and I after all the Tributes are finished with theirs. Have I ever mentioned that I hate interviews. No? Well...

I HATE interviews.

I just think they're so dumb. Why do all these people want to know about my life? Why do they need to know about my life? It's my life and not theirs but hence Peeta and I are Capitol celebrities we hardly get a say in what we do and don't do. It's all up to the Capitol, always has and most likely always will.

Haymitch told Peeta and I that the interview would be the perfect time to announce my pregnancy to the country. He says it's a good way to distract people from the Games. Why would Haymitch suddenly want the Capitolites to be distracted from the Games? It all seems a little weird to me but I push those thoughts to the back of my mind.

Madge and Rory are with Cinna and Portia getting ready for the Interviews tonight and Haymitch won't tell us what their angles are. He says he wants to surprise us with them, whatever that means. He's just being the same old Haymitch.

 **~  
** Peeta and I are sitting with Haymitch in the Mentor's section of the audience waiting for the Interviews to start and eventually they do.

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen!" Caesars voice booms through the studio.

"Tonight we'll be interviewing the Tributes of the 75th HUNGER GAMES!" The crowd explodes into cheers and Caesar has to dial them down.

"Now, let's bring out our first Tribute. From District 1..."

Caesar goes on with the other Tributes and then he reaches District 12,

"From District 12... Madge Undersee!" Caesar says, the crowd cheers as Madge walks out.

She looks beautiful. Her blonde hair is curled and she is wearing a light pink dress with glitter on the skirt. After she sits down is when the crowd quiets.

"So, Madge," Caesar starts. "How are you finding the Capitol?"

"Oh. Everything's great." Madge says. "I can't say I have a favorite thing here because it's all just so wonderful."

"That's sweet." Caesar tells her. "What was it like when you first arrived?"

"I could barely see anything when I arrived, Caesar. The camera flashes got in the way." She tells him and it makes the crowd laugh and Caesar chuckles.

"That tends to happen every year." He tells her.

"I can only imagine." Madge says. Caesar chuckles again.

"How are you liking your Mentors?" he asks.

"Well," Madge starts. "Katniss, Peeta and I have gone to school together since we were five," I smile as I remember the story Peeta told me in the cave last year of how he first noticed me when we were five. "I'm really good friends with the both of them. Haymitch, on the other hand, I haven't known him long enough to determine if I like him or not, but I like him so far."

"I can just not get over how incredibly sweet and nice you are." Caesar tells her.

"Why, thank you Caesar." Madge says. The the buzzer goes off and Madge goes backstage.

"Finally, our final Tribute of the night." Caesar says. "From District 12... Rory Hawthorne!"

The crowd cheers again as Rory walks out.

He's wearing a black suit with a red tie. Similar to Peeta's from last year. _Shit._

My breath hitches at the sight and I grab Peeta's hand and squeeze it to remind myself that we're not Tributes this year. I can feel his gaze on me and I can tell he's concerned I don't even have to look at him.

I take a few deep breaths and close my eyes. The images in my mind fade away and I open them again, then I look over at Peeta. As I predicted, concern in his eyes.

"Are you okay?" He whispers.

"Yeah. I'm fine." I tell him. I loosen my grip on his hand but I don't let go of it. I lay my head on his shoulder and he kisses my hair.

"So, Rory." Caesar starts. "How are YOU enjoying the Capitol?"

"It's way fancier than at home that's for sure." He says. The crowd and Caesar chuckle.

"What did your family tell you when they came to say goodbye?" He asks.

"Well, my older brother told me to be brave and not let fear overtake me." Rory answers. Gale really told him that? Never thought I'd hear Gale say something like that, let alone hear OF Gale saying something like that. He would say something similar to that but he would say the exact words. I guess it's different with his family, just like me. I always act different around people that I care about and love deeply. If I'm around anyone else, I'm not my usual self and everyone knows it.

"That does come in handy in an Arena that's for sure." Caesar tells him. "So, tell me. Is there a special girl back home?" _Just like he asked Peeta last year._ I think and I smile at the memory. I look over to Peeta, he smiles at me and I smile back.

"Yeah, there is actually." Rory says. "We're in the same grade, we're the same age, we've been best friends for as long as I can remember." I already know the answer to this and I know for a fact that she likes him back.

"Who is this lucky lady?" Caesar asks. Rory takes a deep breath before replying,

"Her name is Primrose Everdeen."

The crowd gasps and so does Caesar. Peeta and I look at each other, I just smile at him and he smiles back. Then we turn our heads back to the stage.

"Katniss Mellark's little sister?" He asks. Rory just nods,

"Yeah." He starts. "I don't really know when I realized I liked her, I just found myself always wanting to be around her one day. If I assume correctly, I started walking home with Prim and Katniss when Prim and I were about... ten years old? Katniss, help me out here."

I know the camera's are on me now so I answer,

"Nope, you and Prim were nine years old. Pretty close though, Rory, pretty close." Then the cameras focus back on Rory and Caesar.

"There we have it folks!" Caesar says. Then Rory's buzzer goes off so he says goodbye and heads backstage.

"Now, we have some very special guests..." Caesar says. Time for mine and Peeta's interview. "Please welcome, our Star-Crossed Lovers from District 12, Katniss and Peeta Mellark!"

The crowd goes crazy as Peeta and I get up from our seats and make our way towards the stage. Our Capitol smiles plastered on our faces. Once the crowd dials down, we take our seats next to Caesar.

"So, what's it like being Mentor's this year." Caesar asks us.

"It's very different than being a Tribute that's for sure." Peeta says.

"We're seeing things from outside of the Arena." I say. "We get to experience what happens behind the scenes. You know what I mean?"

"I think I can vision myself in a Mentor's shoes." Caesar says. _Even with nightmares and flashbacks? I don't think so._ I think to myself.

"You two seem to be very attached to your Tributes this year." Caesar says.

"Madge was one of my best friends when Peeta and I went to school." I tell him. "I met Rory because I used to work with his older brother." I obviously say work instead of hunt.

"I talked to Madge a little when I went to school." Peeta says. "I met Rory about a month ago, but we're pretty close."

"That's very sweet." Caesar says. "Now Katniss," I face him and focus on the question he's about to give me. "What do you think about Rory liking your little sister?" Why did I expect that?

"I think it's adorable because I know a little secret." I say.

"What might that secret be?" Caesar asks.

"I know for a fact... that Prim likes Rory, too." I say. The crowd gasps and then begin cheering. Caesar along with them.

"Well, there's something for him to fight for." Caesar says.

"Yeah, I guess that is Caesar." I say.

"So, how are Panem's favorite newlyweds?" Caesar asks.

"Actually Caesar, we have some big news." I say. I turn to Peeta so he can announce it.

Peeta places his hand on my still flat abdomen,

"In about eight months, the Mellark family will be expanding by one." He says. The crowd is silent for a second and then bursts into cheers.

"Katniss! You're pregnant?" Caesar exclaims.

"I'm a month along, yes!" I say excitedly. "I just told Peeta the other night."

"Well, congratulations you two!" He says excitedly.

"Thank you, Caesar." Peeta says. "We're both really excited about this."

"Well, we're all happy for you guys!" He says. "Katniss and Peeta Mellark everybody!"

The crowd cheers, Peeta and I say our goodbye's and walk off the stage. Then everyone starts filing out of the building and Haymitch, Rory and Madge meet Peeta and I at the car. We get in and head back to the Training Center.

 **Peeta POV**

When we reach the Training Center, and arrive on our floor, Rory asks,

"Prim really likes me back, Katniss?"

"Rory, I don't think she knows how to shut up about you." Katniss tells him. I smile at her comment and so does Rory. "So yes, she really does like you back."

"Cool." He says. With that, he and Madge go to their rooms for the night. Effie retires to her room as well, and Katniss, Haymitch and I sit in the front room. Not doing much. We're all sitting in a comfortable silence. It's not really awkward because we're all used to quiet most times.

"I'll be right back." Katniss says. Then she gets up off the couch and speed walks to the hallway. I have a feeling I should follow her, but I don't.

"You know," Haymitch starts, "Rory admitting he likes Prim just reminds me so much of when you admitted to liking Katniss last year."

"Yeah, except Rory didn't get pushed into a vase for it." I say jokingly. We both chuckle and then fall back into silence.

After a few minutes, Katniss still hasn't come back.

"Where do you think Katniss went?" I ask. "It's been a while since she left."

"I don't know," He says. "Let's go find her."

I nod and we both stand and walk down the hallway Katniss went down.

"I don't see her." I say.

"Neither do I." Haymitch says.

We walk down the hallway a little more and then Haymitch stops.

"What is it?" I ask him.

"Do you hear that?" He asks. We go silent and I listen for what he's talking about.

Then I hear it.

The sobs and cries of Katniss.

"Let's go." I whisper to him. He nods and we follow the sound of her cries as they get louder and louder as we get closer and closer.

Suddenly her cries stop, Haymitch and I stop walking waiting to see if she'll make more noise.

Then I hear something I haven't heard since I was five...

Katniss starts singing.

 _Rescue me from the demons in my mind_

 _Rescue me from the shadows that try_

 _and hide me,_

 _Maybe the light can find me_

 _I've gotta get away_

 _So please rescue me_

What she sang is dark, very dark and I know the meaning she's put behind them. She's singing about her flashbacks, obviously. Her flashbacks are the demons on her mind that haunt her and will continue to haunt her for the rest of her life, sadly. When she sings that she wants someone to rescue her, I'm pretty sure she means help her out of them. Help her get away from the demons that bring horrible images to her mind.

This gets me thinking. Is she having a flashback right now? Is she having a pre-flashback? Usually she starts playing Real or Not Real when she feels a flashback coming on. Is she having a panic attack? What's going through her head right now? I wish I knew so I could help her.

"Let's go get her." Haymitch says. I nod and follow him. When we round the corner, Katniss is against the wall with her knees hugged to her chest and shaking uncontrollably. I'm by her side immediately.

"Katniss?" She starts crying again. "Katniss. Talk to me."

"I..I.." She stutters. "It's all my fault."

"What's all your fault?" I ask her.

"Rue. I was thinking about how she would enjoy seeing us so happy together and I just lost it, because she's dead, and it's all my fault because I couldn't save her!" She sobs.

I pull her into my embrace and attempt to calm her.

"It's not your fault, Katniss." I tell her softly. "You didn't Reap her for the Games. You didn't put that spear through her stomach. You didn't do any of those things, so please don't blame yourself."

"The voices in my head," She says after a few minutes, "they always tell me that it's all my fault she's dead and I can't help but believe them. I don't even fight the demons in my mind that say those things to me. I never feel like I can."

I run my hand up and down her arm. "Whenever those voices come back, just come to me and I'll help you okay?" I tell her.

She nods against my chest and we just sit in silence in the dark hallway. I look over my shoulder and notice that Haymitch is no longer in the hallway. He must've thought I could handle it and left.

Katniss and I just sit in the hallway for who knows how long. It must be a while though because the next time I look down at Katniss, she's sound asleep. I pick her up off the floor and head back to our room.

I tuck Katniss in under the covers and then climb in next to her. I pull her to my chest and soon fall asleep.

 **A/N: YAY! Chapter 12! What did you guys think of Rory admitting he like's Prim? I just thought it was too good NOT to put in. Don't worry! The second chapters of "Newfound Love" and "I Need You" are in the making and should be up soon! How are you enjoying the story so far? Leave a review and let me know! Happy Holidays!**

 **~LetKatnissCatchFire**


	13. Chapter 13: The Quarter Quell

**Chapter 13**

The Quarter Quell

 **Katniss POV**

Today is the day I've been dreading since our first day here. Today is the day Madge and Rory go into the Games. Today is the day all of these innocent kids face the horrors of the Games that all of the Victor's have faced.

And only one can come out.

Yeah, I'm not looking forward to this AT ALL.

I'm trying to forget about my breakdown last night, but it seems like if anything I think about involves Rue I can't forget it. No matter how hard I try. Peeta says it'll be alright because we have each other so we can help one another through the nightmares and the relapses. The relapses are mostly me obviously.

Right now, Peeta and I are laying in bed. He's still sleeping but I woke up a few minutes ago. I like looking at Peeta's face while he sleeps. He looks so peaceful, like he never had to go through the time's in the Arena. But he did. We both did. That's a bond between Victor's that nobody else understands. It's unbreakable. You can't just un-see an Arena, it would take magic to make the horrifying images go away. But they never will.

They never will...

I sit up and hug my knees to my chest. My muscles tightening.

"Not Real. Not Real." I feel Peeta stir next to me.

"Katniss?" He says groggily.

"I'm not in the Arena anymore. Real or Not Real?" I ask. I can feel Peeta quickly sit up.

"Katniss?" He says. Clearly awake now.

"I'm not in the Arena anymore. Real or Not Real?" I ask through gritted teeth.

"Not real." He tells me.

"M-my-my monologue." I manage to get out before the Arena appears again. Peeta starts rubbing my back.

"Your name is Katniss Mellark, your home is District 12, you're seventeen years old, you're married to me, Peeta Mellark, you're one month pregnant, you're a Victor of the 74th Hunger Games, you're mentoring this year with me." He says. Then he adds,

"You're safe."

"Not... Real." I breathe.

"That's right Katniss, Not Real." He says. Still rubbing my back. I feel my muscles relax and I unwrap my arms from around my legs. I take a deep breath,

"Thanks, Peeta." I say.

"No problem." He tells me. "What set you off?"

"I was thinking about the Arena and the horrors it holds and how we can never un-see what we saw and then I felt the flashback coming on." I say. "I could feel a scream forming and I didn't want to wake everyone else so I held it in. That's why my muscles were so tense."

"It's okay now." He tells me. I lean my head on his shoulder.

"I almost screamed when I told you to say my monologue. That's why I was struggling telling you."

"It's okay, Katniss." He says. He wraps me in his warm embrace and we sit there in silence.

After a few minutes, Effie ruins the moment.

"Up, up, up, up! Today is going to be a big, big, big, big day!" She squeals. Peeta and I pull apart and then start getting ready.

After we've both showered, brushed our teeth and got dressed (and after I have my usual morning sickness), Peeta asks me,

"Are you ready for this?"

"As ready as I'll ever be." I tell him.

With that, we walk out of our compartment to go meet Haymitch.

 **Peeta POV**

We meet Haymitch in the living room, he comes up to us when he sees us coming.

"You guys ready?" He asks.

"I guess so." I say. He nods and then turns to Katniss,

"What about you, sweetheart?" He asks her.

"I think I'll manage, but you both know I can't always control them." She says.

"We know." Haymitch tells her. "Just start Real or Not Real if it happens remember?" She nods, remembering what happened not too long ago this morning, Haymitch motions for us to follow him and he leads us to the Mentor's room in the Main Floor of the Training Center.

When we walk in, we notice that most of the Mentor's are already here. I immediately recognize Finnick Odair from District 4. He's sitting with a girl who I recognize as Annie Cresta, she won a few years after Finnick did.

"Everyone, I want you to meet Katniss and Peeta. They'll be mentoring with me this year." Haymitch introduces us.

Finnick and Annie are the first ones to walk up to us.

"Hi, I'm Finnick and this is Annie." He says, pointing to Annie as she stands behind him.

"It's lovely to meet you." She says.

"It's nice to meet you, too." Katniss says as she smiles at Annie and Annie smiles back. I think they'll be pretty good friends.

"We should go find our seats." Finnick says, then he and Annie walk away.

Next is Johanna Mason. She won by acting like a useless, scared little girl and in the end, she let her inner monster show and slaughtered the last few Tributes with an axe.

I'm going to have to remind myself not to make her mad when she has an axe in her hand.

"Hey, I'm Johanna." She says.

"Katniss." Katniss tells her.

"I'm Peeta." I tell her. She nods.

"So, you guys are the newbies this year?" She asks.

"Yeah, I guess." Katniss says. "I'm a little worried though."

"Why?" Johanna asks.

"Reasons." Katniss says, nervously.

"Well, hopefully you'll be okay." She says, then she walks over to her seat.

"Okay, you guys will meet more people later, let's get you seated." Haymitch tells us. He leads us over to our seats. We're all seated in front of a big screen that will show the Games. The sponsor gift area is on the other side of the room.

I grab Katniss's hand.

"You gonna be okay?" I ask her. She turns to me and nods.

"I think so. I'll just do what Haymitch said if it happens, I'll start Real or Not Real."

"Okay."

We turn and face the screen as it begins.

 **The 75** **th** **Annual Hunger Games**

 **The Third Quarter Quell**

 **Tributes: 24**

When the words fade, we see the Tributes rise up on their podiums and we finally get to see what the Aren looks like.

The podiums are surrounded by water and the Cornucopia is on a rock island and there are black, stone pathways after every two tributes.

The Arena is one big jungle.

I don't like this already.

But then again, who really enjoys the Games besides the Capitol?

 **Katniss POV**

The Arena is one huge jungle, I definitely wasn't expecting that.

But then again, what _was_ I expecting?

I don't know, I never know what to expect when it comes to the Capitol.

I can only hope that when mine and Peeta's child is of age he or she doesn't get Reaped. That's not likely to happen though, the Capitol will probably want to see he or she follow in his or hers mother and father's footsteps.

I hate the Capitol... I hate the Capitol so god damn much.

All the Tributes look around as they take in the Arena around them. Not everyone knows how to swim and Madge and Rory never mentioned a pool for people to learn. It would've given too much away as to the setting of the Arena.

The countdown is almost over and all of the Tributes get ready to dive into the water.

Except Madge. In fact, Madge looks like she's crying.

Why is Madge crying? What happened before she was risen up into the Arena?

"Peeta, what did they do to her?" I ask him.

"Who?" He asks, looking at me.

"Madge. Look, she's crying." I tell him. He looks back at the screen and sees Madge crying.

"I don't know. I do know it wasn't good though." He says. I nod and face the screen again.

The gong sounds and half of the Tributes dive into the water. I silently thank myself for teaching Rory how to swim when he was little. I don't know if Madge knows how to swim or not.

Hopefully, she does.

I see the other Tributes jump into the water, they start splashing around in the water and it takes them a minute to realize they're not drowning.

Wait... they're _not_ drowning.

What the hell?

"The belts are flotation devices." I hear Finnick say.

Of course, the Capitol wouldn't want anyone dying _without_ being brutally slaughtered.

Madge finally get's it together enough to dive into the water. I see Rory grab a bow and arrow and two sheaths of arrows. I silently thank Gale for teaching him to hunt when he was 7. Madge makes it to the Cornucopia without difficulties and grabs a spear. She must've done well with it during training.

Madge and Rory reunite and head off towards the beach. Some of the Tributes try to go after them, but Rory quickly takes them out. Suddenly, I remember my Reaping day.

" _You know how to hunt."_

" _Animals." I said._

" _It's no different, Katniss." Gale had said._

Rory just killed those people without a moments hesitation...

Did Gale tell Rory the same thing he told me last year?

"It's no different." I whisper to no one in particular. "It's no different."

"Katniss, what is it?" I hear Peeta ask next to me.

I blink and look over at him,

"Um... nothing. I'll tell you later." I tell him.

"Okay." He says, warily, then he leans back in his chair.

" _Hey, you guys want to form an alliance?"_ I hear Cato's cousin ask. He's asking Madge and Rory. Will this go well?

" _How do we know we can trust you?"_ Rory asks. Smart kid.

" _I'm not like my cousin. I'm not a bloodthirsty murderer."_ He says. He really shouldn't be talking like that on national TV, but then again, what can they do to punish him? He's already been thrown into the Hunger Games.

" _What's your name? We never learned it."_ Madge asks him.

" _My name is Max. Max Jacobs."_ He says. Max Jacobs. He sounds like an interesting kid. At least he's nothing like Cato.

" _Okay, the three of us then."_ Rory says.

" _Let's get out of here before more Tributes come."_ Max says. Madge and Rory nod and follow max into the Jungle. As they're running the cannons start.

8 dead already.

The Games have only just begun.

 **A/N: I know! I know! I haven't updated this story in a really long time! Don't shoot me! I'm trying to get better with writing and updating! I promise to TRY and update more often so I don't leave you guys hanging to too, too, long. Have an amazing day!**

 **~LetKatnissCatchFire**


	14. Chapter 14: The Arena: Day 1

**Chapter 14**

 **The Arena: Day 1**

 **Katniss POV  
**

All of the Tributes are trying to find a safe place to stay and rest. Even though there's no such thing as "safe" in an arena. There are 16 Tributes left so far, I know Madge said that not all of the Tributes even did anything during training, but I think I'm starting to understand why. This years Tributes were smart and didn't show their strengths, just like Peeta and I did last year. After seeing this years bloodbath, I've seen what the other Tributes can do and they're all pretty lethal if you ask me.

All of us Victor's are sitting in the Visual Room watching the Games as they happen. There's a big screen high on the wall that shows the Games as the Districts are seeing them, then bellow it are smaller screens, two for each District, one shows what the male Tribute is doing and the other shows what the female Tribute is doing.

The Capitol is so high tech, it surprises me every time.

Right now, I'm watching Madge run through the jungle as far away from the other Tributes as possible. She has a few weapons including a knife, spear, and even a bow with two deaths of arrows. I know that Madge doesn't know how to shoot, but she may learn fast when a life or death stumbles soon her. Who am I kidding? In an arena it's life or death 24/7. Every decision you make determines if you live or die.

I look over to the other screen to see what Rory's up to. He's currently dodging weapons being thrown and shot at him. He dodges five knives, two spears and eight arrows. Rory has a bow and arrows himself so he shoots back whenever he has the opportunity. Max comes to help him and pretty soon, the Tribute is dead and his cannon fires.

Max looks so much like Cato, they could be twins.

I stiffen at the thought of Cato. He almost killed Peeta and I last year and then was eaten alive by the Mutts of the dead tributes. Images begin to swirl in my head of Cato killing Peeta, Prim, my mother, the worst one I see is Cato killing a baby that looks like the perfect mixture of Peers and I. That's enough to set me off, I don't scream, but try to convince myself that it's not real.

"Not Real. Not Real. Not Real. Not Real." I whisper chant to myself. I subconsciously grab someone's hand in a death grip. It's probably Peers, but Cato killed him. Right? I continue to look at the screen until I don't see it anymore and the images take over. I keep whispering "Not Real", but it's not working very well.

"Katniss?" I hear a soft yet concerned voice say. It sounds like Peeta, I look around frantically for him. How is he alive?

"Katniss can you hear me?" The voice comes again.

"Yes." I say, my voice shakes a little.

"Do you know who I am?" The voice asks.

"Peeta?" I ask.

"Yeah. I'm right here, Katniss." He says.

"But you're dead. Cato killed you." I say. Then hesitantly ask, "Real, or Not Real?"

"Not Real, Katniss." He says. "I'm right here." I feel two hands on either side of my face and I think he's trying to make eye contact with me, but I can't see him.

"Cato killed Prim, Real or Not Real?" I ask.

"Not Real." He says.

"Cato killed my mother, Real or Not Real?"

"Not Real."

"Cato killed the baby, Real or Not Real?" I hear his breath hitch, but he continues anyway.

"Not Real."

The images of Cato killing everyone I love fade away and I see Peeta's concerned blue eyes stating back at me. I also notice everyone in the visual room stopped watching the Games and are now watching what just happened.

"Okay people, back to your regularly scheduled program." I hear Haymitch say. "Nothing to see here." The other Victors look back at their screens to check up on their Tributes and I look at Peeta.

"Are you okay?" He asks.

"I will be." I reply. "Just give me a minute." He nods, wraps his arm around me and pulls me to him. I lay my head on his shoulder and we continue to watch the screens.

 **Rory POV**

I'm not sure if I completely trust Max, but then again how can you fully trust somebody in an arena where everyone wants to kill you?

I still can't believe that I've killed. I never imagined myself becoming a killer. I never imagined being a Tribute in The Hunger Games. I constantly wonder how Prim is doing. Only one of us can leave this arena, and what if it's not me? What if I die in here? Will Prim fall for someone else?

I never thought I'd ever had a chance with her, and knowing she likes me back comes as a shock. It's also another good reason that Katniss loves Peeta and not Gale, because if Prim and I ever get married, they'd be in-laws, and that'd be awkward.

"RORY!" I hear my name, I snap out of my thoughts and look to see Max waving his hand in font of my face. Trying to get my attention.

"Finally!" He says. "We've been trying to get your attention for the past ten minutes!"

"Sorry." I say.

"It's fine." He says. "Alright, we need to plan. The Careers are probably stocked up on supplies and have plenty of sponsors. They don't need any help. We need to get sponsors. The more sponsors the more gifts. Which means more supplies."

"All the Careers have to do is kill someone and they get a Christmas Dinner!" Madge exclaims. "Not fair."

"Trust me, I don't think it's fair either." Max tells her. "That's why I didn't join them. I don't want to end up a psychopath like my cousin."

"You're nothing like him." Madge says, putting a hand on his shoulder. There's a moment where none of us say a word, and Max breaks the silence with,

"We need to plan." Madge and I nod and we sit in a circle.

"Splitting the supplies evenly between the three of us would only make us run out sooner than needed. _So,_ we're only going to use the supplies we have if absolutely necessary." Madge and I nod. "Now, obviously we need water or we'll die from dehydration. We need to find a water source."

"I didn't see any water sources while we were running away from the bloodbath." Madge says.

"Maybe if we get an overlook of the Arena we could find something." Max suggests.

"Rory, you know how to climb." Madge says to me. "Climb one of the trees and see if you can find anything." I nod and make my way to the tallest tree I can find.

I begin to climb, working around the twisted branches and make it to the top. I spot a clearing in the branches and head towards it. I get a good overlook of the Arena and the only water I can see is the water our Tribute podiums are in. That's salt water, so that's not an option. It doesn't look like I'll find anything, so I make my way down.

"Well?" Max asks, when my feet hit the ground.

"Nothing." I tell them. "The only water I saw was the water our podiums are in and that's salt water."

"We'll figure something out." Max says. I nod.

"We might want to get moving." I suggest. "I don't think we should stay in the same place for very long." Max nods and looks to Madge, who nods. We grab our supplies and make our way deeper into the jungle. Hopefully we'll find water soon, we'll need it if we want to stay strong, and if we get attacked we'll need the strength and energy.

I hate The Hunger Games.

 **A/N: Okay, hey everyone! Gee, I haven't updated this story in forever and I feel really bad because I left you guys with a cliffhanger on chapter 13! Anyways, there is a poll on my page asking which one of my stories you guys want me to update that I haven't updated already. I can take "Always" off of it because I just updated it!** **Anyways, you can either vote on the poll or you can tell me which story you want to see updated out of the poll choices in the reviews. Hope you enjoyed it! Until next time!**

 **~Charlotte**


	15. Chapter 15: The Arena: Day 2

**Chapter 15**

 **The Arena: Day 2**

 **Katniss POV**

Nothing much has happened since the first day. Nobody killed anyone in the middle of the night, nobody went 'hunting' for anybody last night either. In fact, even the Careers seemed to lay low. It was weird. This years Games are unlike any Games I've ever seen. Though, I haven't seen many. Only seventeen and the only Games I remember vividly is mine and Peeta's last year.

I look on the screen and see that Madge, Rory and Max are starting to wake up so I keep my attention to the screen, but I hold Peeta's hand tight in mine.

 **Rory POV**

This is more uncomfortable than my bed in the Seam. Did I fall onto the floor again? I groan and roll over onto my back. When I hear the sound of small twigs crushing under my body, I remember I'm in the Hunger Games area.

So it _wasn't_ all a dream.

I sit up and rub the sleep from my eyes and yawn. Ugh, I miss the Tribute beds..so much right now. I sigh and look over at Madge and Max. Max has one arm under his head and the other arm draped across his chest as he lays on his back. Madge, laying on her stomach, has one of her legs bent like some sort of triangle and her two hands under her cheek. I should probably wake them up, it's going to be a long day. If I yell at them to wake up I could give away our location.

Wherever our location is.

I silently walk over to them and start shaking them awake.

"Madge, Max. Come on, wake up. We have a busy day today." I say as I shake them. Max is the first one to wake up. He groans, sits up and runs a hand over his eyes.

"I was hoping I had dreamed it all." He says.

"You're not the only one." I tell him, then go back to trying to wake Madge up.

"Madge. Wake up. You don't get to sleep in here."

" _Stop."_ She moans. Pushing my hands off of her.

"Madge, if you don't get up right now so help me Max and I will leave you for the Careers." I say. I don't mean it obviously, but I have to get her up somehow.

"OKAY! OKAY! I'M UP!" She exclaims, quickly rolling over and sitting up and fast as she can.

"Good." I say. "Now, let's gather our supplies and see if we can find water and maybe find something to eat."

"Who said you get to make the orders?" Max says. I turn around to face him and get up in his face.

"No offense, Max." I start. My voice threatening. "But I'm pretty sure I've spent more time learning how to hunt and kill for survival in my District than you _ever_ have back in yours. Madge over there has never stepped foot into the woods or whatever jungle we're in. So, since I have more experience in this type of situation, _I_ said I get to make the orders. No questions asked so no answers are needed. Am I clear?"

He sighs heavily, a scowl on his face, but he nods.

"Good." I say. Not breaking eye contact. He may be older than me by a few years, but he made the mistake of underestimating my abilities. I learned everything I know from Gale and Katniss. Which I think makes me pretty dangerous. Am I too confident? Probably. I need to stop being so Capitol like. It's getting to my head.

"Okay, now let's get all of our supplies and go." Max says. Madge nods, gets up and helps us gather the supplies. I have my bow an arrows and Max has a spear. Madge has a knife because she's never really had experience with any deathly weapons. I listen for any animals roaming around and I hear rustling in the branches above us.

So, the hunting begins.

 **Peeta POV**

Katniss clutches my hand tightly, obviously worried about Madge and Rory. Rory had basically told the entire country that he hunts illegally and she's worried that if they caught on, which they probably did, that they'll make Rory's life in the arena hell.

"What if they do something bad to him in there Peeta? Him and Madge?" She asks.

"As if throwing them in the Hunger Games isn't bad enough, I have no idea what they could do that's worse." I tell her softly.

"I don't want him to die." She whispers. "I don't want either of them to die." A tear falls from her eye and I wipe it away, then kiss her forehead.

"I can't say anything to make you feel better, because you're either going to lose one of them or both of them." I tell her. "And all I can say to that is I'm sorry."

She nods, trying to hold her tears back, but it's no use. Katniss is a strong woman, but there are times when she can't be as strong as she'd like. This is one of those times. I pull her out of her seat and into my lap as she silently cries into my shoulder, letting out an occasional whimper.

Some of the other Victors like Finnick and Annie steal glances at us, concern in their eyes for Katniss. They don't even know her that well and they're worried. I think they'd be pretty good friends if we got to know them.

I rub my hand up and down Katniss' arm gently and pull her closer to me. She rests her head on my chest, tears still falling from her eyes. I wish I could keep sadness out of Katniss' life, but that's completely out of my control. I hate seeing her like this, it makes my heart ache.

"I love you, Peeta." She utters so only I can hear. I smile softly and kiss me forehead again.

"I love you, too, Katniss."

 **A/N: CHAPTER 15, WOOHOO! I finally finished it after taking forever. I truly apologize, school takes up most of my time I can hardly write a sentence sometimes. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! There are more to come! Until next time!**

 **~Charlotte**


	16. Chapter 16: The Arena: Day 5

**Chapter 16**

 **The Arena: Day 5**

 **Rory POV**

Nothing's happened for three days. Sure, people have died, but I mean nothing has happened to Madge, Max and I. Honestly, I'm a little on edge. I figured the careers would be after us every hour of every day, but here we are sitting like ducks.

"Ugh, I hate this! I hate waiting, I hate not knowing what's happening!" I shout, breaking he silence that was on us. Back in District 12, I always knew what was happening with each Tribute, now I'm clueless as to what's going on and it's driving me mad. There could be a career heading our way this very minute and I don't know about it!

"Rory, calm down. We'll be fine." Madge tries to calm me down.

"You don't know that, Madge!" I yell.

"Rory, calm down!" Max exclaims. Standing up. "We're all a bit on edge here, just keep it together."

"I'm sorry. I'm just.. stressed." I say.

"Don't worry. I'm sure it won't last long." Madge says.

"You say that like it's a good thing." I tell her, than I continue to pace and wait for something, anything, to happen.

 **Katniss POV**

We watch Rory and Max's small argument, and I remember back to mine and Peeta's Games last year, how I was always on my feet and never wasted a moment on _what ifs._ Then I think back to our little argument about me going to get the medicine for him.

Haven't heard him complain since I got it, so I see no issues there.

As I'm watching the other screens, like I do everyday, I notice that one of the Careers from District 2 is running in Made, Rory and Max' direction.

I know Rory is strong and good at fighting, but that doesn't stop me from worrying and fearing fro his life. Peeta touches my shoulder and I look at him, then I realize that I'm starting hyperventilate.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"It looks like Rory's going to get the action he wants."

 **Rory POV**

We're still sitting here and I'm about to lose it. Suddenly, I hear a ringing noise, I look up and see a parachute coming towards me. I stand up and grab it. I open the box and see nothing but a piece of paper inside. What the hell?

I take the paper out and unfold it, to see a message that says:

 _District 2 Career heading your way. He's close and should be right on you guys in five minutes. Be safe, and stay alive._

 _-Katniss and Peeta_

"What is it, Rory?" Madge asks.

"We're gonna have some company pretty soon." I tell her. She looks at me confused and I give her the piece of paper, Max comes up behind her and reads it over her shoulder.

"We need to get moving." Madge says.

"He probably doesn't even know that we're here." I say. "We have the element of surprise."

"Maybe not." Max says. "Katniss and Peeta gave us a heads up about him coming towards him, what if his mentor gave him a heads up about where we are?"

"He has a good point." Madge stutters. "Rory, we need to run."

"You don't even want to try to fight him?" I ask.

"He's going to try and kill us!" She yells at me. "You two are trained fighters, I'm not! My _ONLY_ defense is to run, so _that's_ what I'm going to do."

"Madge," Max puts a hand on her shoulder, she looks at him and shrugs him off.

"Don't." She tells him. "Don't touch me right now."

I see hurt flash in his eyes. Well that's weird. Then his mask it put back up and he's back to his original self.

There's rustling in the trees. Max and I snap our heads in the direction of the noise and get our weapons ready, Madge has all of her things in her bag and is standing behind us shaking in fear.

Then he bursts through the tress and gives us an evil smirk.

"There you are." He says, then he runs towards us.

I shoot once and he dodges it, Max and I turn around, grab our bags and run. Max grabs Madge's hand and pulls her along, hence she was frozen in place.

I feel something cut my arm and I wince. He probably has knives or something with blades. I turn my head as I continue to run and see him getting ready to throw another one, and it's a dagger.

I quickly nock an arrow and pull back on the bowstring.

Everything happens in slow motion, Madge and Max trip over a rock and fall to the ground, just missing the dagger that was thrown at them.

I keep my arrow nocked, no matter how much pain my arm is in. He grabs another dagger, and just as he throws it, I dodge it.

And then I shoot.

 **Katniss POV**

Everyone watches as Rory dodges the dagger, and shoot.

Everyone watches as Rory trips over Madge and Max and falls to the ground.

Everyone watches as Rory's arrow goes straight into the Careers heart.

Rory, Madge and Max prop themselves up on their elbows, breathing heavily.

The boy falls to his knees and I see the life leave his eyes as he takes his final breath and falls backwards onto the ground.

Rory already killed people back in the Bloodbath, but this kill looks like it's taking more of a toll on him, and I just want to know what's going on inside his head right now.

"Oh my God." I whisper. For some reason, this kill of Rory's also takes a toll on me. Then I remember.

Marvel.

And Rue.

He killed _her_ and I killed _him._

Blood for blood.

I take a deep breath, and let it out shakily. Peeta grabs my hand and I look into his eyes to see his concern.

"Are you okay?" He whispers.

I let out a long sigh. "Yeah." I reply. "It's just... this reminds me of someone."

Peeta furrows his brows, then something seems to click in his head.

"Marvel." He whispers. I nod, shortly.

"I never thought I'd ever see Rory kill a person." I tell him softly. "I guess I just never thought he'd ever be a Tribute, like the lucky people. You know?"

"I get it." He says. "I never thought that I would be Tribute. Or you."

"The universe just doesn't lie us, does it?" I ask. He wraps his arm around me, and I lay my head on his shoulder.

"No, I guess it doesn't." He says, kissing my hair. Then we continue to watch the screen as the sky starts to darken.

I hope this all ends soon.

 **A/N: FINALLY! The 16th chapter of my first** **fan fiction! Ugh, I've been wanting to finish this chapter for so long and now it's finally done! New chapters for my others stories coming as soon as possible!**

 **~Charlotte**


	17. Chapter 17: First and Final

**Chapter 17**

 **First and Final  
**

 **(Day 6, 3:56 AM)**

 **Rory POV**

I'm on first watch tonight. Or at least I was. I was supposed to wake Max up an hour ago, but I need to clear my head.

I've killed people. I killed in the bloodbath without even thinking and I just killed a boy almost five hours ago. How are Max and Madge so calm about this? Madge can't possible be calm, I know her. Maybe not very well, but I know her.

I know Max has killed while we've been in here, maybe he's just used to it.

Then again, how can you get used to death? Especially causing it?

"Rory?" I hear a groggy voice behind me. I look to see that it's Madge. She rubs the sleep from her eyes and looks over at me.

"What are you still doing up? I thought you were supposed to have woken Max up by now." She says.

"I was." I say softly, turning my gaze away from her.

"So, why haven't you?" She asks, coming up and sitting next to me. Cris-crossing her legs.

"I just have a lot on my mind." I tell her, keeping my gaze on the artificial stars in the artificial sky of the arena. I'm surprised I can even see the stars through the trees. "We need to see if we can find water tomorrow. The three of us are almost out."

"Rory, you're distracting yourself so you don't have to face what's really bothering you." Madge says. "So, what's got your mind all jumbled up?"

I sigh heavily and wipe sweat from my face onto my sleeve, sniffling slightly.

"It's just..." I start. "I've never seen myself as a person who would kill others, yet here I am in the Games and I've killed five people."

"I can't imagine how that must feel." She tells me. "I'm not going to pretend to know how you feel about this whole situation, but I do know that it most likely doesn't feel the greatest."

"I killed them, Madge. I _killed them._ Those innocent people who have families. I killed them and I killed them without a second thought." I rant. "I can never forgive myself for that."

"Rory, you killed those people because you were trying to survive. Hell, we're still trying to survive in here." She says. "But who you are and who you need to be to survive are two very different things that some people will never understand."

"Lucky them." I say.

"Yeah," She sighs. "Lucky them."

We sit in silence for what seems like hours when really it's probably only been about five minutes. Madge suddenly breaks the comfortable silence we were in.

"How 'bout you go get some sleep?" She suggests. "I'll keep watch for a while, besides you need all the sleep you can get in here."

I nod and stand from where I was sitting, starting to head over to where Max lay sleeping when I stop. "Hey Madge." I call out her name and turn my head and find her looking at me.

"Yes?" She asks.

"Thanks." I tell her.

"No problem." She says, a smile on her face. I smiles back at her slightly before turning back around and continue my short trek to our sleeping area.

I lay on the hard jungle ground, my bag under my head , standing in for a pillow, and close my eyes as I hope for sleep to find me easily.

It does.

 **oOo**

I wake up to the sun shining in my eyes and I place my hand in front of my face to shield my eyes from the sudden bright light. I look ahead of me and see Madge sitting against a tree, hugging her knees to her chest, breathing rapidly and her eyes wide. I decide to wake Max. I shake him once and he jolts awake.

"What happened?" He asks, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "You never woke me up last night."

"No, I didn't." I admit. "But something's going on with Madge." I nod my head in her direction and he looks to her.

"Let's go see what's got her so spooked." He says, standing up. We walk over to Madge and I kneel in front of her, Max kneels next to me.

"Madge, what's wrong?" I ask her.

She says nothing, but she opens her hand and in it is a dagger covered in blood.

"I killed him." She whispers.

"Killed who?" Max asks her. Madge just nods her head in a direction and we look over to see a kids dead body lying there.

"When did this happen?" Max asks.

"Just a few minutes ago." Made says softly. "His cannon went off, but they haven't come to retrieve him yet."

"Made, what happened?" I ask.

"I was just taking a sip of water and I heard the crunching of leaves and twigs so I put my canteen away." Madge starts. "I stood up and looked around, I didn't see anything or anyone and I was about to put our supplies away when he came out of nowhere and tackled me to the ground. He wrapped his hand around my neck and started trying to choke me. He had a huge rock in his hand and he was about to smash my skull with it and I reached one of my hands over to try to find something to get him off of me. I felt one of your arrows and I grabbed it. Without thinking I stabbed it right through his neck and he fell to the ground. He was dead shortly after."

"Madge it's going to be okay." I tell her.

"I killed someone, Rory!" She exclaims. "I killed someone! I now know what it feels like to have a persons blood on your hands and I can't deal with it!"

"Madge, it's okay. We'll help you through it and you'll be fine." Max tells her. "Rory and I have killed people, too. We can help you."

"I know you can," She says, a tear falls down her cheek and she speaks again. "but you won't."

Before Max or I can ask her what she means she pulls out a bloody arrow and plunges it into her neck. Max and I's eyes widen and he runs over to catch Madge before she falls to the ground.

"Madge you idiot." I hear him whisper. "Why would you do this? I've hardly known you for a week, but I know you don't think about doing things like this."

"I can't handle having someone's blood on my hands." She gasps out. "I didn't want to wait for someone to kill me."

Tears pool in my eyes and I let them fall. Madge is my friend. I kneel down next to her dying body and grab one of her hands.

"I'll tell your parents about everything." I tell her. "Don't worry." She nods and smiles at me, then she starts coughing and blood spews from her mouth.

She continues to choke on her own blood and she suddenly stops moving. A canon goes off and I know that she's gone. I start sobbing and I let go of Madge's hand and stand up. I run my hands through my hair and tug on it in anger and sadness.

"God dammit!" I shout and I punch a nearby tree. I immediately regret doing so because I hear a crack in my hand and I let out a small cry of pain.

I hear the hovercrafts coming to take Madge and that one boys' bodies away and I see Max gently lay Madge's head down onto the jungle floor. I kneel back down to my now dead friend and close her open, lifeless eyes. Max and I stand, gather our supplies and run as far away from Madge's lifeless corpse as our legs can take us.

As we run, more tears fall from my face as sadness takes over me. I stumble and fall to my knees onto the ground and bring my head to the ground, placing my hands on the back of my head. I let out a cry of agony and start sobbing uncontrollably. Katniss and Gale brought me to Madge's house to deliver strawberries on multiple occasions and there were days when I had to go alone and do it so Katniss and Gale could get their rounds done faster. In all those years of delivering to her back door, I really got to know Madge as more than the Mayor's daughter, but as an actual person, and knowing that someone as kind and generous as her had just taken her own life was both saddening and angering to me. She didn't deserve to die like that. She deserved to fall in love, get married, have children, grandchildren, grow old and die form old age. Not commit suicide in The Hunger Games.

"Rory, come one we don't have time for this. Someone could hear you." I hear Max above me.

I raise my head and torso, still sitting on my knees. I sniffle and wipe my eyes, the tears still making my vision blurry. "Yeah, we should keep going."

I stand up and Max and I continue our trek to a different spot of the arena, hopefully a spot where none of the careers are located.

But I don't think we'll be so lucky.

 **A/N: Aye, look. I'm actually updating Always. I'm such an amazing author. Not really. It's almost June and the last time I updated this story was in January and I feel really bad about it. I am so sorry. I'm going to try to update this story more and hopefully finish it this summer. The thing is though, the MacBook I have is a school computer and I don't have a personal laptop of my own which makes me really angry. I do have a Kindle though so I can update on that because I've done it before. That's what I'll probably end up doing. I'm going to try and update some of my other stories either today or tomorrow. Promise. Until next time.**

 **~Charlotte**


	18. I'm So Sorry

Hey y'all.

First of all, I want to say I'm sorry for not updating this story because I know there are a lot of people who still read it and keep up with it and it's not fair to those readers that I am rushing to put chapters together because I want to put something out for this story.

Second of all, I'm not really in the Hunger Games fandom all that much anymore, so I have less motivation and inspiration for the chapters to this story and my other Hunger Games fanfictions.

Third of all, this hiatus is NOT going to last forever. I'm not going to be one of _those_ authors who puts a story on hiatus and then never comes back to finish it. Always WILL be finished, I just don't necessarily know _when_.

I want to thank the people who understand and don't attack me when it comes to updates because I do have a somewhat busy schedule on a day to day basis and I can't just spend all my time in front of my laptop writing out chapters for all my stories.

Even though I _really_ wish I could.

Always is the first story I ever posted on this sight almost three years ago when I was twelve. _Twelve!_ When I look back on the first few chapters I just think to myself "what was I thinking uploading that?"

So, when I _do_ start writing Always again, expect some chapter replacements.

Or I might just do the chapter replacements while the story is on hiatus so your poor eyes don't have to look at those ugly first chapters ever again.

And again, I say I am NOT saying _goodbye_ to Always. I am simply saying, _See you later._

Until the Always hiatus is over, you can check out my other stories that you might be interested in.

The stories I am currently updating/working on updating are"

1\. Two In A Million (An Austin & Ally fanfic)

2\. Daddy's Little Girl (TVD fanfic)

3\. Redemption (TVD/Originals fanfic)

4\. Starting Over (TVD fanfic)

5\. Promise (Stranger Things fanfic)

6\. May We Meet Again (The 100 fanfic)

7\. The Other Salvatore (TVD/Twilight fanfic)

8\. Please Don't Leave Me (The 100 fanfic)

9\. The Difference Between Love and Lust (The 100 fanfic)

10\. Twilight Wolf (Teen Wolf/Twilight crossover)

11\. Blood Love (Twilight fanfic)

Once again, I am so sorry for any inconvenience. If an of you have any questions about anything regarding the hiatus or just any of my stories in general, you can always PM me. I answer _every_ message.

Thank you for understanding.

~Charlotte


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